1. Rob_E

    Rob_E Registered User

    Feb 1, 2015
    156
    Male
    Liverpool
    I guess sometimes its the seemingly smaller, more trivial things that can cause the most frustration. Beyond doing the most basic things mum is now completely dependant upon me and carers to get meals, dress and look afer her personal hygiene etc. Over the past few years she has developed a habit of grunting/groaning and while I feel awful for saying this, I really find it an annoying habit! I wonder how common this is? In some ways I'm surprised that it is this that seems to be causing me the most irritation right now and feel bad about it.
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,904
    Kent
    I bet she has no idea what she is doing @Rob_E

    I had a friend who was quite ill and she made heavy sighing sounds. I realised her partner was making the same sounds as if mirroring my friend`s emotions.

    I know it`s not the same as your mother and do understand how irritating it can be. I wonder if these sounds are her inner feelings but she is unaware they can be heard.
     
  3. Fullticket

    Fullticket Registered User

    Apr 19, 2016
    460
    Chard, Somerset
    With mum it was constantly shuffling her feet on the floor. I could cope when it was the hard kitchen floor but when she sat to watch TV she shuffled the rug (a thick one, with a lining to prevent slipping) into a ruck and it drove me mad. She had no idea she was doing it.
     
  4. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    9,643
    Female
    South coast
    Mum didnt do this, but there was a lady in her care home who did.
    I gather that vocalisation is often used as a self-soothing mechanism, like thumb sucking in babies. Have you tried something like a cuddly toy which might work as a substitute for self-soothing? I wonder whether medication for anxiety might help?
     
  5. patbryn

    patbryn Registered User

    Mar 22, 2019
    81
    Male
    Wales
    For yourself get some headphones and listen to what ever you like, tune out the noise and try to relax a bit
     
  6. Duggies-girl

    Duggies-girl Registered User

    Sep 6, 2017
    1,455
    Dad sings a little tune every time he moves Bom di bom bom bom Di de de de de

    It drives me nuts.
     
  7. tryingmybest

    tryingmybest Registered User

    May 22, 2015
    616
    Female
    #7 tryingmybest, Apr 17, 2019
    Last edited: Apr 17, 2019
    Oh yes! Mum lives with me and aside from the constant crying and wailing, also grunts and groans. I know she can't help it but it is dreadfully annoying! She also tap dances with her feet on the floor constantly, or if she wants attention keeps banging them together loudly on the floor, especially in the bedroom at night. I have wooden floorboards everywhere as live in a cottage so it's really noisy when she does this. She has also started tapping her fingers on the candlesticks and coasters throughout mealtimes at the table, and the basin in the bathroom and headboard in bed. It's definitely a cacophony of sound in my house. Sigh.
     
  8. Rob_E

    Rob_E Registered User

    Feb 1, 2015
    156
    Male
    Liverpool
    As always, thanks for the replies everyone!
     

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