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Grumpy OH

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Beads, Aug 14, 2017.

  1. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    My husband has been on it for a year and it is doing well.
    I took it myself when I suffered from dizzines related to labyrinth issues
     
  2. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    Hi Beads, you did well to accept your daughter's invitation. My husband, too, says he does not need me, but five minutes after telling me , he calls me because he needs something.
    I, too, ignore him when he is angry with me. I am annoyed by his silence because he uses it as a sort of punishment for my insubordination, but I do not actually miss conversation with him
     
  3. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    Thanks, Beads, I feel better.
    My husband did not talk to me till he woke up after his afternoon nap. He went to bed a resentful man and got out of it a different person.
    I did not ask him about his change of mood.
    Till some time ago I tried to understand, now I have given up.
    I take note and go on
     
  4. longlostfan

    longlostfan Registered User

    Aug 14, 2016
    22
    Oh Beads that sounds awful. How on earth do we all carry on? Daft question, we have to and so we do, at least we can all rant to each other. And of course this thing of "I can look after myself" etc when that's a non-starter, when meals/washing blah blah are done by you alone without appreciation, that's the last straw. When people say "that's the dementia" I think........hmmmmmm......really? Sorry to hear about your leg, on top of everything else, cos I bet your walks are your escape from reality. I ride a adult tricycle and had about 8 weeks when I couldn't because of broken wrist - and I really missed that.
    It's a bit sunnier here today, hope it is where you are too. Have to cycle to dentists this afternoon (for me)
    Well it's a bit of an outing ........good grief to think that the dentists is a form of escapism! I should be locked up (maybe that'll happen later). Hope your day goes as ok as it can xx
     
  5. Beads

    Beads Registered User

    Jul 19, 2017
    184
    Hi Gilly 1952, hope your well. You sound a bit more relaxed now that you have organised & are getting through your list of things to do. Tyres done ✅ windscreen wipers , if you go to a motor parts shop they will take old off & replace them . So don't be worrying about that. In fact where I go they just replace the rubber for me which is good. Just ask shy kids get nothing. Ha ha. Then that's another job done they will also top up your fluid for your washers ,.OH moods change like the weather really annoying you feel like you need to rush about so they not waiting too long. You did well standing your ground with mental health service good for you & you jumped a day earlier excellent. You definitely got a result there . Another job sorted. You want to write yourself a list of things you need to ask . As on the day you might forget something. That's what I do. I have learnt by mistakes in past. Well I have just had lunch not a healthy one by the way . Never mind I won't be eating much the rest of the day. Didn't go walking thought I would leave it till Monday. Take care speak soon ..
     
  6. Beads

    Beads Registered User

    Jul 19, 2017
    184
    Hi longlostfan hope u ok & are having a good day , well as good as possible .Well Saturday he can look after himself as I am going out with daughter for a few hours. Yes sometimes dementia is used as an excuse when really it's just the person been there normal self .Well in my OH it is (otherwise he has had dementia 34 years ) . Thankyou my leg is on the mend not going on my walk till Monday . Ye it is an escape I really love walking. Oh that's cool a tricycle, I bet you did miss it 8 weeks is a long time. You must have been really stressed then. The weather is better here today we have a little sun & it's dry . How sad are we looking forward to going to the dentist as it gets us away for awhile. You & me both should be locked up , but hey once we start taking ourselves serious then we should worry. Hope all goes well at dentist . Speak soon. Take care...xx
     
  7. Beads

    Beads Registered User

    Jul 19, 2017
    184
    Hi Margherita you sound a lot more yourself today. Hope you feel lots better. All good then till the next time with OH. I am the same as you I find it easier to be deaf & dumb that way I don't get verbally abused. I have given up . Hope you having a peaceful day . Speak soon take care.....
     
  8. Beads

    Beads Registered User

    Jul 19, 2017
    184
    Hi MIA56 how's tricks . Hope things are ok You must be having a busy day you sometimes on here early morning. Check in later to see all ok. Take care speak soon. ...
     
  9. MIA56

    MIA56 Registered User

    Dec 22, 2016
    195
    Hi @Beads not sure if you read my post a couple of days ago bit I'm up to my armpits with my SIL financial stuff. I've been reading but no time to post! All is good J just bobbing along and eating for Scotland but hey. He's not for going out but I'm quite happy as loads to do. Packing boxes taking over our lives the garage is almost full but we are getting there. Glad you're going out on Saturday FREEDOM!! Mr Pottymouth might just miss you.
    The kids are doing well but my granddaughter who is 7 months pregnant is dying to get home too hot for her. She's been pretty grumpy don't think she realised how it would take it out of her!

    To everyone else I've been reading and my thoughts are with you as you all continue on the great journey.
    I sit and wonder how our Grumpy O/Hs would look after us.

    @margherita so nice that you sound more like yourself

    Take care everyone. X
     
  10. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    I'm tired tonight, but it is not my husband's fault.
    This morning we went out at about 11.00am and when we got back two hours later, we found that burglars had visited our home
    It was a mess, things everywhere. They were looking for money and jewels, but we keep neither of them in the house. So, they stole 50 € and went away, after searching drawers, cupboards, book-cases and even the refrigerator...
    I spent the whole afternoon tidying up and now I am in bed.
    Hope I can have a good night's sleep.

    Goodnight to you all
     
  11. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    52,638
    Dundee
    Oh - @margherita - how awful! I'm so sorry to hear that. It must have been awful for you. I do hope you manage to get some rest tonight.
     
  12. HillyBilly

    HillyBilly Registered User

    Dec 21, 2015
    1,843
    Ireland
    That's awful @margherita. It's a horrible feeling when you've had intruders in your house.
    I hope you manage to get a decent night's sleep x
     
  13. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    It was something I thought would happen one day or another. Our house is quite isolated and I had heard of burglaries in our area.
    My husband has some valuable objects, but they did not even notice them.
    The only thing they wanted was money and jewels.
    I suppose they were watching us and waiting for us to go out.

    Good night to you Izzy.
    Hope your leg is better
     
  14. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    As you say it is the intrusion that is more disturbing and the idea that these burglars can do what they want when they want. The police don't care..
    When we went to report the theft, they told us to come tomorrow because they had no time....and the office was empty
     
  15. Amethyst59

    Amethyst59 Registered User

    Jul 3, 2017
    801
    Kent
    Oh, Margherita....I'm glad I checked this evening. I am so sorry...what a horrible thing to happen. Stupid police. I hope you manage to get a good nights sleep. Much love x x
     
  16. margherita

    margherita Registered User

    May 30, 2017
    638
    Female
    Italy, Milan and Acqui Terme
    Thank you Amethyst.
    Have a peaceful night
     
  17. Everton Annie

    Everton Annie Registered User

    Feb 25, 2015
    93
    Hatfield Hertfordshire
    How horrible for you both @margherita. It feels so invasive and another thing to get through. I hope you are OK and manage a good night's sleep.

    I have had quite a bizarre day today. I have been the cook, the cleaner, the gardener, the dog walker and the shower lady. I have been told what each of these people have done and how well they did or didn't do it. And I wasn't the drinker tonight! No Ned or The Doctors tonight but who knows what tomorrow will bring. Peaceful night all
     
  18. Beads

    Beads Registered User

    Jul 19, 2017
    184
    Hi MIA OH yes I forgot about you sorting SIL finances. You certainly have plenty on the go with that & packing as well. Busy busy . You will be shattered tonight hope you treat yourself too a big glass of well deserved wine. .Oh yes your granddaughter bless her I bet she can't wait either to get home. She will be exhausted in that heat. Don't be overdoing it MIA56 take care speak soon. ...
     
  19. Beads

    Beads Registered User

    Jul 19, 2017
    184
    OH Margherita so sorry to hear you had burglars. How horrible to think of someone searching through your possessions absolutely dreadful. I hope also that you can have a goodnights sleep. Thinking of you & sending ((( ))) hugs. Take care ....
     
  20. longlostfan

    longlostfan Registered User

    Aug 14, 2016
    22
    @margharita - so sorry to hear your disturbing news and do hope you're ok - it's the intrusion that's horrid isn't it - thinking of of you xx
     

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