I can't stop crying. on 22nd May my Pete went in for respite for 2 weeks. Its been extended with the view of it becoming permanent. He's in a home that I'm unhappy with. I realise that the care they give will not be the same as I give him but his basic needs are not being met. He's incontinent and his pads are only being changed sparodically which has resulted in an open sore. I reported on the day (last Wednesday) and nothing had been done. I purchased some suda cream myself yesterday. It hadn't been passed on at shift change so staff yesterday were totally unaware. He's not always eating 'he said he's not hungry' and yet when I take him later to the dining room, get his meal, cut it up, he eats most of it. Including my own sandwiches, a sausage roll that I had brought him and a trifle...not hungry?! This has happened twice now. and so it goes on..My biggest fear is they are talking about DOL's in a couple of weeks, If I agree to this I will in effect be signing him over to the state. I'm not convinced. I even went to the home where he had day respite yesterday in desperation. It's not modern like this one, but it's home from home. I know they really do care and its not just a means to an end. On top of all this 2 letters arrived yesterday to tell me how much this is going to cost...I can't afford it and the only way out as far as I can see is bankrupsy. I work full time but tomorrow I will start making calls to try and get help and advise. I miss his so much. I go to see him every day. I guess I am grieving for the living and will have this to go through again one day for real.Lets hope not soon. It's his Birthday today
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