Goodbye and Hello

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
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South East
Morning @Sarasa , I’m ok thank you :) hot and restless legs, instead of tossing and turning keeping him indoors awake I decided to just get up and play solitaire on iPad , then about 7.30am when he went to work I went back to bed . Not long woke up?
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
Morning @jennifer1967 , that’s kind of you , thank you . We haven’t actually tried the pull ups yet , I keep trying to hold it off for some reason . Still having the same accidents but they are random , can be morning, afternoon or evening so hoping the new toilet seat will work for a while .
 

angelict

Registered User
Jan 16, 2020
154
0
Morning Woo2 you can only do your best if you haven't done so already speak to the Continence dept you can self refer for the pull ups have a good day
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
We have had a few more ,but I am trying to chill about it a bit. It is yes , been trying to accept it will have to happen , if I didn’t have girls still at home I could prob cope but it’s their home too and they have a right to a normal ish life once they can go out and about again. Thank you for thinking of us .
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
Ah thank you @angelict i didn’t know that . Have mentioned to Gp a couple of times. It’s not as set times and more that she doesn’t recognise toilet I think , she doesn’t know where toilet paper should go .
 

angelict

Registered User
Jan 16, 2020
154
0
I found out by chance due to District Nurses not being bothered to fill in paperwork phoning up the dept ona Friday before Christmas 2019 just wha you really want to do anyway my Mum deserves better and I did it for her as no one else will. Anyway the head lead from the dept now rings me every couple of months even got a tape measure in the post from her lucky me lol?
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
Ok I will look in to it thank you ? Wow lucky you , don’t tell too many people or else everyone will want one !?
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,119
0
Bedford
Sorry to hear that Christmas did not quite go the way you hoped for. Dementia really is cruel. I am glad that some far more knowledgeable people than me have made some ‘bathroom’ suggestions and maybe they will help a little.
I hope by now that Mary has been back and that you have managed to have a few hours break too. Been thinking of you especially as lock down makes it all harder.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
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South East
Thanks @Bikerbeth , Mary had been back twice , she actually had her first vaccination last week but is still reticent to spend much time here with mum , I just wonder if there is more to it , she is having some counselling so think she really needs some time . I cannot decide wether to find another carer or just to hold on until Mum goes In to home . Looked at some others on a drive by last week , I really would like to see inside them too. The CQC reports are all similar so not much separating them , would like to just get a feel for the places .
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,119
0
Bedford
It must be really hard trying to choose a CH at the moment. Some homes seem to be posting on their FB pages still which perhaps gives a feel for them and I think some are doing virtual tours. I guess the other is to find out what their visiting policies are. I do sometimes wonder whether some of the smaller ones which perhaps don’t have the technology or knowledge to do this though could be ‘missed’ out despite being excellent on the caring side which is most important. It think staffing levels are a problem at most care homes at the moment but it might be worth checking on the internet to see if a home is always trying to recruit staff. Apologies if you are already doing all of this.
I guess your Mum should soon be on the list for a vaccination along with your in laws if I remember rightly (as I think one of them was also classed as vulnerable)
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
7,195
0
Nottinghamshire
I agree with what @Bikerbeth says about researching care homes. I do think visiting is good for getting a care home to get a feel is important, but so is word of mouth. Have you spoken to anyone with a relative in a local home to get their thoughts?
I looked at three homes for mum. All had good points and less good points. What swayed me to the one she is in was chatting to someone whose mother was in it. Just chatting to someone with a bit of 'insider knowledge' was good, and put my mind at rest.
No home is going to be ideal, but I reckon if you are about 70 to 80% content with it, it's good enough.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
Good ideas thanks , don’t know anyone with a relative in a home , no one to ask . I know of someone that was in one I am considering but that was a while ago . I’m not on any social media sites . I really liked the sound of staff at a very small home but they don’t do virtual tours . Luckily hubby knows the inside of all of them as he has inspected them all in the past and he has a rough idea on how they are and how the staff are but that was before Covid , I will just plump for one and if I have to move Mum then so be it . Hoping mum gets a letter soon for the jab and will enquire if I can have one too . A family member who isn’t a registered or paid carer got theirs whilst taking an elderly relative .
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,119
0
Bedford
It is good at least that hubby has visited quite a few in the past. I now remember you saying that previously.
I am impressed on how your gardening is going via the other post. I have got as far as ordering seed potatoes, onions and runner beans. I have also made myself a calendar as to what I should be doing this year especially as I missed thing I should have done at the end of last year!
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
Joined the RHS and they tell me when to do what ........ if I remembered to log in of course :rolleyes: We do watch gardening programmed so had an idea. I have been left the task of planting seeds this week to go in the greenhouse , I don’t like the responsibility though so may assist hubby the weekend instead . Calendar a good idea . We aren’t doing runner beans this year , we only got a few at a time , not enough for a meal ,the French beans we will. Enjoy . X
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
7,195
0
Nottinghamshire
We hope to be moving sometime before the end of March. The new garden is enormous so we're planning what we'll be planting. I have a plum tree that is a bit miserable in its pot (our current garden is paved) so my first job will be planting that out and finding it a couple of friends.
Good your husband has some insight into local homes @Woo2 . Have you got your mum down for any of them. You can always say not yet if they have a space for her.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
3,652
0
South East
I have her name down on one but haven’t heard , I will call them though and remind them I am still here . I am going to ask a friend to have a look on fb , just still not quite ready , I would like to wait until she has had both vaccinations . Good luck with the move and the new home for plum tree @Sarasa ? The new garden will keep you busy .
 

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
808
0
I hope you manage to find a home you are happy with, good that your hubby has visited a few. I can understand how you feel, wanting your mum to have the protection from the vaccinations. Mum had hers at the weekend in the care home, and I'm looking forward to 2/3 weeks time when she will have built up a good level of protection. This talk of gardening makes me feel that Spring and the hope of better things isn't too far away.