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Goodbye and Hello

Sarasa

Registered User
Apr 13, 2018
1,830
Do you think it’s an ear infection or that her hearing has got worse for some reason? Does she wear hearing aids, because if she does they might need adjusting. Maybe tap her on the shoulder and make sure she can see your lips when you talk. I can’t lip read as such but searing peoples mouths helps me understand what they are saying. If it is an ear infection they can jolly well hurt.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,775
South East
She refuses to wear hearing aids as she say’s they are too big and uncomfortable , we did looking at getting her smaller ones privately but I wonder how much is due to hearing or Dementia . She will hear if I ask I she wants cake or ice cream 😊 Crafty Minx .
 

Sarasa

Registered User
Apr 13, 2018
1,830
I’d not bother with trying private hearing aids. Your brain needs to adjust to them and if you have dementia it’s too late. Hope you get to the bottom of what ever is causing the decline, and that there is some improvement.
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
1,708
Yorkshire
She is def sleeping more @annielou , it’s not that that has upset me it’s the troubled look on her face and the answer’s taking so long , there is really such a long gap in answering , even yesterday when she couldn’t hear she was answering when I shouted at her , today she heard me knock on her door ok but took so long to reply to my question’s , when I ask her is she is ok, in pain , need anything she just looks in to space . I have pulled myself together a bit and have watched a film but can feel the tears are bubbling under the surface , it really isn’t me to cry . I think maybe its because I can see that she is going to need more than I give her very soon or maybe it’s something else , I just know I feel completely adrift . Appreciate the hugs thank you so much 😊 Will see how she is in the morning , I really don’t want her to have to go to hospital unless absolutely necessary.
Those are feelings I recognise and I'm so sorry you're having them. I imagine a lot of carers get them at some point. No wonder you want to cry ❤:( In lieu of any useful advice, which I'm sadly lacking, here's a few more hugs 🤗 🤗 🤗
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,775
South East
Thanks @Sarasa , I did think that, I feel bad she can’t here but it wasn’t much better when she wore them which makes me think it was more a processing issue . Thank you @annielou , hugs always appreciated and it helps hugely . Will just wait and see how she is this morning , not up yet .
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
1,625
Bedford
I hope your Mum is feeling better today. I hope you are able to find out if it is a UTI or get to the doctor.
I know you were feeling a bit better but if you feel like crying have a good ‘wail’ and then you will be able to move on. Lots of hugs from too 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,775
South East
Thank you @Bikerbeth 😊 Mum happy and laughing along this morning , hubby playing the village idiot to make her laugh . She had breakfast ok and I got her in shower and had hair wash . Got her dressed and left her to dry her hair , when I went back in after 10 minutes she has changed back in to pyjamas . Got her dressed again and out in garden reading paper until Mary turned up. Hearing still bad ,putting in drops she got from Dr before for last few days but will get them to check it . I do think she has moved a stage , she has been pretty stable for last 2 years so we were expecting a drop at some point . Mr Woo2 thinks DC twice a week is wearing her out , will reassess I guess .Mary told me earlier she has applied for teaching job😐 she wants to still come on a Sunday though , that’s good but it isn’t going to help me much so we might have to look for another or agency .Hope you still having a lovely time away and weather good.
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
1,625
Bedford
Glad to hear that your Mum was better this morning. I guess when you can get your Mum’s hearing checked out that might make a difference. We all know dementia is a one way street but it doesn’t help knowing it though.
Sorry to hear about Mary, just as it was helping you out a bit and your Mum got on with her. Maybe if you are looking for ‘someone’ else they could do a half day to replace one of the Day Care days if you see what I mean.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,775
South East
For sure , I put drops in just now and they disappeared straight down whereas they had been pooling in her outer ear as if it was blocked . Not made any difference to her hearing though , I will get it checked this week . I am pondering DC as I think I will struggle only having one day a week to do my jobs , but we will see what happens . If that’s best for mum then so be it .Mum is getting hump now if she can’t see me and going to bed during the day if I even go to washing machine ,or hoover upstairs , if I’m out of sight for more than 5-10 minutes off she goes . Will also call CMHT just to chat about it and see what they think . Mary might not get it but I have to be prepared now as she is obviously looking for more work but doesn’t want to stick with just us as I offered her more hrs , I can understand that .
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
1,625
Bedford
How are you and your Mum doing?
Have you made any decisions about day care yet as to whether to cut the days down?
Have you started to look for Mary 2? It is such a shame that Mary 1 cannot continue. If Mary 1 still came on Sunday would it perhaps give you time to go out with hubby and girls.
How is your Mum’s hearing?
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,775
South East
Thanks @Bikerbeth , haven’t decided about DC just carrying on for now . Mary didn’t get one of the jobs she went for , waiting for news about the other one , I’m not sure if she knows herself what she wants , just taking things as they come, I haven’t looked at another agency yet . I emailed a couple of the homes but they haven’t replied , that was a couple of weeks ago . We are plodding along ok at the moment , can all change in a heartbeat I know . Mums hearing is better since I put the drops in so I am continuing with them.
 

anxious annie

Registered User
Jan 2, 2019
504
I hope that your mum's hearing continues to improve with the drops. It's a worry when there's a deterioration and you can't quite pin point what could be causing it. A bit of a roller coaster caring for someone with dementia. Fingers crossed you soon see an improvement.