good days in carehome and bad days

annii1

Registered User
Jul 5, 2012
194
west sussex
Saw mum today, she has been so settled of late in carehome, thought antipsychotics were helping after a year being in such an emotional turmoil and not settling in carehome. Today mum angry, hating it, took her out and had something to eat, which seemed to help, but I felt so.wretched taking her back, I hate this illness and all it destroys. I suppose like us all, mum will have better days than others. X
 

Gigglemore

Registered User
Oct 18, 2013
526
British Isles
Yes, there are a few saintly folk who never seem in a bad mood but most of us get grumpy sometimes so I guess that will carry on if we get dementia. But it's great that you have seen her more settled, and she is so lucky that she has a good daughter who will take her out.

Agree, hate this illness for all it does to our loved ones and the distress it causes those of us who must watch.

Try to forget this visit, hopefully you just caught your mum in a bad mood. Keeping my fingers crossed that your next visit is happier.
 

angecmc

Registered User
Dec 25, 2012
2,108
hertfordshire
My Mum does that too, after a bad visit, I dread going back next day, but usually find she is completely different again:confused:, I too hate this disease xx

Ange
 

annii1

Registered User
Jul 5, 2012
194
west sussex
Thank you both. I think having 4 different visitors this week was probably too much for mum as unfortunately it reminds mum if what she used to have, so sad, my poor, lovely mum.
 

Solihull

Registered User
Oct 2, 2014
97
West Midlands
I agree Annii1 sometimes it is better to leave a few days between any visits as I am sure my mom needs her rest - too much conversation confuses her and reminds her of her past which I do wonder if this is good or not. Even the old photos must be unsettling at times.
Sue
Xx
 

angecmc

Registered User
Dec 25, 2012
2,108
hertfordshire
I agree Annii1 sometimes it is better to leave a few days between any visits as I am sure my mom needs her rest - too much conversation confuses her and reminds her of her past which I do wonder if this is good or not. Even the old photos must be unsettling at times.
Sue
Xx
You are right about the old photos, my Mum refused to look at the photo albums about a year ago, they were definitely not a comfort to her, we just have a photo of Dad and Mum taken recently in her room now, she was throwing all the photos in the bin. Xx

Ange
 

Solihull

Registered User
Oct 2, 2014
97
West Midlands
You are right about the old photos, my Mum refused to look at the photo albums about a year ago, they were definitely not a comfort to her, we just have a photo of Dad and Mum taken recently in her room now, she was throwing all the photos in the bin. Xx

Ange
Thanks Ange, I was under the impression that we must keep mom's old memories alive but suspected that they made her quite sad. I now realise that the more recent photos of those of us she remembers seem to be more comforting xx
 

angecmc

Registered User
Dec 25, 2012
2,108
hertfordshire
Thanks Ange, I was under the impression that we must keep mom's old memories alive but suspected that they made her quite sad. I now realise that the more recent photos of those of us she remembers seem to be more comforting xx
I guess every person is different, my Mums care home keep saying about looking at old photos with Mum because they believe it helps, but it certainly doesn't help my Mum, just makes her angry and agitated x

Ange
 

Pete R

Registered User
Jul 26, 2014
2,044
Staffs
There is just no right way of doing things is there.:confused:

If there is I didn't get the memo. Anyone got a copy.:)