1. plastic scouser

    plastic scouser Registered User

    Well finally we managed to get Dad into respite care, much to the relief of my Mum. However within 48hrs of him being there it became very clear that he won't be coming back out. Which despite everything has been a massive blow.

    I'm a bit lost as to how I feel about this - I'm glad that Mum has finally got a rest but I'm so sad for Mum as she now knows that she's "lost" her partner of over 40 years and that he won't ever come home again. Against that I'm also so sad that Dad has been taken into care and that in all likelihood he won't come home again...:(
     
  2. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Hiya Plastic Scouser,
    Give yourself time - it does become easier.
    Mum has not lost her partner - he is still there, they still need one another. He has had to move to a new home, as his health demands it, but the relationship is not broken. There are still special moments to be had together.
    Love Helen
     
  3. Lila13

    Lila13 Registered User

    Feb 24, 2006
    1,342
    Hope he's near enough for you and your mother to visit him often.

    Lila

     
  4. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,598
    Kent
    Hi plastic scouser, It`s such a body blow when, what is thought of as temporary turns out to be permanent. Even so, it shows it was on the cards. Your dad would have only managed one or two respite sessions at most, before it would have had to be permanent, so perhaps it`s better to get it all over in one go.

    I too hope the Home is local enough for you and your mum to be able to visit often. She hasn`t `lost` your dad, he is there for her, but in a different place. I hope she will feel relief, eventually, and be able to rebuild her strength.

    This is another phase to cope with. Stay strong. Sylvia
     
  5. Nell

    Nell Registered User

    Aug 9, 2005
    1,170
    Australia
    Thinking of you and your Mum. If you can, try to see it as a new beginning. For your Mum it may be the break she needs to keep her going. I echo what others have said about their relationship. Hope you find the strength to keep on going and to see the positive side. Nell
     

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