going through it again by jimsandy


Registered User
Jan 31, 2008
Soldiers Grove
We put our mom in the nursing home in November and had to deal with issues of her going home and when. That is not up to us, but up to the powers that be, like doctors or courts. We know she won't ever go back to her own home again. But she was recently put in the hospital to take care of an infection and some other issues. She came back to nursing home the other day and is now back on the kick of "when is she going home". I tell her she is probably not going home and that is up to the doctors, etc. She really does not want to hear that and is back to asking about her home and vehicle etc. I tell her people are keeping an eye on those things and so are we. She feels that all we are wanting is her monies and we are power of attorney and take care of her bills, taxes and other issues. At times, it is very frustrating to deal with it all and we do have to repeat things over and over again at the same sitting while we are visiting. She now wants to have a television in her room, I am concerned if she gets one put in her room, she will never want to leave the room as there will be nothing else to do outside of the room. We will be checking on her house soon again, personally and try to get her television from her house if possible. Otherwise, we will take a small one we have at our home to give her for now. I think ours is more up to date than hers, as it will have to be able to be hooked to cable. I guess I am just so frustrated, as it was a few steps forward and now we are going back to step one again, after her stay at hospital. She does not remember any of the times she has spent in the hospital(s) or elsewhere, and know that this is the best taht it is going to be with the alzheimers/dementia. Thanks for just being out there and letting me vent and I am sure I will have better days and so will she at some point down the road. I really miss the mom that I grew up with, never thought I would be in this situation either.


Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
She now wants to have a television in her room, I am concerned if she gets one put in her room, she will never want to leave the room as there will be nothing else to do outside of the room.

I have seen loads of people in care home with TV in they rooms , its company for them .

My mother like the TV in her room on all the time at home with me .

when in emergency respite for 2 mouths they said I could get a TV for my mother in her room . she still went out of the room .


Registered User
Jul 31, 2007
Dear jimsandy,
With all the comings and going that your Mother has been through, it will take her time to settle.
I know it is a terrible time for you and you want your Mother back. My husband wanted a T.V. in his room and it did not stop him from wandering along the corridors and when he was able to, he use to leave his t.v. switched on and go and watch the large t.v. in the lounge, until he was moving furniture around and stacking it up. As he moved this large t.v. (£2,000) it smashed to the floor. Care Home were brilliant about it.
It is such a tough rough road we go down but taking each day as it comes, gradually when your Mum is settled, you will still have your Mum, just remember she is still there just a horrible illness that takes away so much from us but it can never take away the love we have for our loved ones.
I wish you all the best.


Registered User
Jan 29, 2008
Ashford, Kent

It is frustrating going over the same ground again and again, but sadly they do get fixated on things.

I know for my Dad, money is always something prevalent in his mind. He constantly asks how much he has in the bank, and when he can go and take it all out.

He goes through his box of important papers frequently, and hides stuff he thinks people might steal (he lives with us, so it's upetting to realise he is hiding them from his family).

You're doing all you can - just keep reassuring her that her propery is fine.

Beverley x

Forum statistics

Latest member
Maureen R