Words mean different things to different people. No one else has the right to say 'go with the flow' to us except ourselves.
Sometimes it seems to indicate they are not listening. It can sound very dismissive.
We are the only ones who know the speed and temperature of the flow. I do try and go with the everchanging flow myself, because it works.
On one level I pick my fights, I chose those that I have a good chance of winning. I ditch the rest for another day, often when that day comes the situation has solved itself.
On another level I do take up issues but I detach from the outcome, I just feel by adding my voice to others one of us might tip the balance.
It does not matter who benefits, me or the next generation of Carers.
I suppose my reward is that it gives me extra purpose and meaning.
It stops me feeling a victim, so it is empowering.
I came across these words, 'have perspective, do everything the best way you can, then accept that you can do no more'
To accept the the situation as it is moment by moment is not giving in, it is not passive but a positive way of handling present reality.
What I do know is that my mood affects that actions of others. It is knowing when to resist and when to let go. What is important and what is not. There is always a funny side, often well hidden though.
One headmaster used to tell his new pupils, you have no rights only responsibilities in Life. Privileges are a bonus but not to be expected.
This group of illnesses in all its shades certainly teach us that harsh reality.
At the moment it is nearly four in the morning, all is quiet, it is easy to write this. I know the new day will bring new challenges, I will cope or not cope.
This bit of self talk just puts a bit of Tiger in my tank.
Over my husband's needs I am becoming quite a tiger.
So to all you tigers out there, stretch, relax pretend you are just a pussy cat.
May you all get strokes and a dish of cream.
Skimmed milk for GrannyG group, of course!
All we can do is work out what works for us.
I agree with what Sylvia said and also with your last sentence.We cannot change it So we shoulder on. I did for almost 15 yyears 10 at home with no help my husband would not have accepted it.