Getting to end of my tether

Discussion in 'LGBT people with dementia and carers' started by Georgiebob, Aug 3, 2015.

  1. Georgiebob

    Georgiebob Registered User

    Aug 3, 2015
    2
    I'm58. My partner of 40 years is 73. He has Alzheimers and vascular dementia. I gave up work in march 2015 to care for him full time. He was diagnosed with cancer recently and has completed six weeks of chemo/radiotherapy. He has been left with diarrhoea as a result of the treatment (although no longer as severe as it was). He obsesses about toileting. Consequently I spend hours every day (and night) assisting with real or imagined toileting issues. I feel as though my very breath is being drained from me. What to do?
     
  2. mrs mcgonnagal

    mrs mcgonnagal Registered User

    May 9, 2015
    153
    Oh my. Have you any help? If not i would contact social services, McMillan nurses, local Alzheimer's society. You have a lot on. I know there will be a lot of help and advice from the experienced and caring people on here. It's a life line. Very best wishes to you .
     
  3. Georgiebob

    Georgiebob Registered User

    Aug 3, 2015
    2
    Thank you for reply.

    He is not terminally ill and thankfully support from Macmillan is not required. I have family members who are very supportive, however they have their own lives and I can hardly call them at every hour of the day and night. I suspect you know what a lonely place is that of a carer for an Alzheimer's sufferer. My partner insisted on retiring to bed at 7pm this evening. I know with the best will in the world (even in spite of sleeping pills) he will be up and roaming at 2 or 3 am.
     
  4. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,900
    Female
    Dundee
    Hi and welcome to TP. I'm sorry to read about your partners dementia. I must admit that toilet issues are the things that get to me most (my husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer's almost 14 years ago. He is also 21 years older than me.) Sorry, that's not a lot of help. Just wanted to say I understand!

    Would it be worth a visit to the GP to see if he/she has any suggestions re the diarrhoea? My other thought is the Admiral Nurse Service. If there is an Admiral Nurse in your area you might benefit from a visit from one. If there isn't you can telephone or email. This is their site-

    http://www.dementiauk.org/what-we-do/admiral-nurses/individual-teams-services/
     

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