I have two people with dementia who I am partly responsible for.
My mother-in-law lives right near us. She is definitely showing signs of dementia although at a memory clinic (a couple of years back) she was apparently given the all clear. For a long time she has been 'scatty' about times, dates and numbers - but she has got a lot worse recently. For the past 3 weeks she has barely got out of bed, often not getting dressed and not washing regularly. She wasn't taking her medication and forgot to eat - so we've been going in 3 times a day to make sure that she takes her pills and eats 3 meals a day, plus walk her dog and do any washing she has. We can't carry on providing this level of support due to (seasonal) work demands. She has a cleaner who comes in weekly. My husband has a LPA in place for her. She is very sociable but has never, in the 20+ years I've known her, made any effort to build friendships or have any regular kind of social life. She makes no effort to organise herself (and never has) so life is very chaotic.
My aunt lives 2 hours away. She never married or had children. Her neighbour called me to say that she is worried she isn't eating properly, is struggling to shop and she is very lonely. Physically she is in good shape, but thin. I have been going up every 6 weeks or so for the past 5 months and have helped sort out some of her practical problems, done her tax return, sorted out the LPA, talked with her. Her short term memory is terrible. but she tries very hard, making notes for herself, keeping things in regular places - when I last went up a month ago I felt she was coping adequately. She has been to a memory clinic last year and was diagnosed with dementia.
I think both probably could do with someone going in a couple of times a day to make sure that they are eating and provide some company. I just don't know where to begin to find help that will be reliable that we can trust? Both have a good level of funds ...I'm not sure if they are entitled to any financial help? Some people have said I need to speak to their doctors, some have said speak to the council, some have said speak to private care providers - where to go, where to start? I want the best for both of them but we have 2 children, a business to run, I have 3 jobs to try to make ends meet and it feels like we are not doing enough for either of them, but I need some me-time too.
Please can someone point me in right direction.
My mother-in-law lives right near us. She is definitely showing signs of dementia although at a memory clinic (a couple of years back) she was apparently given the all clear. For a long time she has been 'scatty' about times, dates and numbers - but she has got a lot worse recently. For the past 3 weeks she has barely got out of bed, often not getting dressed and not washing regularly. She wasn't taking her medication and forgot to eat - so we've been going in 3 times a day to make sure that she takes her pills and eats 3 meals a day, plus walk her dog and do any washing she has. We can't carry on providing this level of support due to (seasonal) work demands. She has a cleaner who comes in weekly. My husband has a LPA in place for her. She is very sociable but has never, in the 20+ years I've known her, made any effort to build friendships or have any regular kind of social life. She makes no effort to organise herself (and never has) so life is very chaotic.
My aunt lives 2 hours away. She never married or had children. Her neighbour called me to say that she is worried she isn't eating properly, is struggling to shop and she is very lonely. Physically she is in good shape, but thin. I have been going up every 6 weeks or so for the past 5 months and have helped sort out some of her practical problems, done her tax return, sorted out the LPA, talked with her. Her short term memory is terrible. but she tries very hard, making notes for herself, keeping things in regular places - when I last went up a month ago I felt she was coping adequately. She has been to a memory clinic last year and was diagnosed with dementia.
I think both probably could do with someone going in a couple of times a day to make sure that they are eating and provide some company. I just don't know where to begin to find help that will be reliable that we can trust? Both have a good level of funds ...I'm not sure if they are entitled to any financial help? Some people have said I need to speak to their doctors, some have said speak to the council, some have said speak to private care providers - where to go, where to start? I want the best for both of them but we have 2 children, a business to run, I have 3 jobs to try to make ends meet and it feels like we are not doing enough for either of them, but I need some me-time too.
Please can someone point me in right direction.