My mum is in the process of purchasing a flat close to where I live, to allow me to care for her. It has been suggested (by someone in social services) that we put the property in both mine and my brother's names so as not to have this taken into account in the future, should she need to go into care. Has anyone any experience of this? I'd be grateful for any info.
future possible care home fees
- Thread starter Lulu
- Start date
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bjthink
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Lulu said:
If she agrees, I think it's a great idea. It also potentially avoids Inheritance Tax
If she 'gifts' you both her home, during her lifetime, the LA can't put a charge on it, should she go into care.
It's also not a bad idea to reduce her capital to under £6,000, too, so she won't have to contribute to any domiciliary care which social services might put in, at some later stage.
I've a feeling there is a 7 year wait once a gift has been made, before it can be considered safe.
I'm sure there is someone on TP ot the AS Helpline who can confirm yea or nay.
I'm sure there is someone on TP ot the AS Helpline who can confirm yea or nay.
B
bjthink
Guest
Brucie said:
That certainly applies to IHT (Inheritance Tax), although there's a sliding scale from 3 years on.
That's why I said 'potential' as far as IHT is concerned.
However, I'm not sure that the same applies to SS payments.
We 'seized' my mother's capital six months ago, and this was disregarded for the domiciliary care funding assessment in December. But her income is over the limits, anyway, so she still has to pay.
They seemed OK about the capital being transferred to us, although they knew that this was on the instruction of the Bank and the advice of the police.
SS can delve back as far as they want if they think there has been any attempt to avoid payment, it's a mine field. Why not check it out with the help line Lulu? Love She. XX
another query
Thinking further ahead into the future, I should perhaps be starting to think about a nursing home for Mum, should it become necessary. The Consultant told us that due to its slow progression so far, we may not ever get to the final stages, but I think it would perhaps be wise to make enquiries. I saw a message I think from Sheila saying it is a good idea to look at the options well in advance, as then you can try it out as respite care etc. Does anyone have ideas on where I can begin?
I am told Mum is still in the early stages, but she is due another appointment in March (12months). Think she is much the same. She seems to look after herself personally, but does not take the initiative -I need to tell her what to do and when to do it -do all her meals-her shopping etc. I get quite 'down' about it at times because she just accepts all that I do as being quite normal -as if it's all as it should be. She often doesn't want to come out even with us (if it's somewhere she doesn't particualarly want to go), but then when I ask her, '..and what have you being doing this aftrenoon?', she puts that look on her face, shrugs her shoulders and says, in that voice, ..'Nothing. Nothing TO do, is there'. She says this all the time. Do you think she isn't aware she says it, or is it meant to upset me and feel awful?!
Thank you, and sorry to be a nuisance again.
Thinking further ahead into the future, I should perhaps be starting to think about a nursing home for Mum, should it become necessary. The Consultant told us that due to its slow progression so far, we may not ever get to the final stages, but I think it would perhaps be wise to make enquiries. I saw a message I think from Sheila saying it is a good idea to look at the options well in advance, as then you can try it out as respite care etc. Does anyone have ideas on where I can begin?
I am told Mum is still in the early stages, but she is due another appointment in March (12months). Think she is much the same. She seems to look after herself personally, but does not take the initiative -I need to tell her what to do and when to do it -do all her meals-her shopping etc. I get quite 'down' about it at times because she just accepts all that I do as being quite normal -as if it's all as it should be. She often doesn't want to come out even with us (if it's somewhere she doesn't particualarly want to go), but then when I ask her, '..and what have you being doing this aftrenoon?', she puts that look on her face, shrugs her shoulders and says, in that voice, ..'Nothing. Nothing TO do, is there'. She says this all the time. Do you think she isn't aware she says it, or is it meant to upset me and feel awful?!
Thank you, and sorry to be a nuisance again.
Hi Lulu
I'm pleased that things posted on TP are useful to you.
I'd like to stress that you aren't being a nuisance at all!!!!
Learning more is what TP is all about, and if we were not ALL being 'nuisances' then there would be nothing here to see.
About what Mum says - no, she isn't trying to hurt you, but she does know what she is saying. People with dementia strip away all the sugary coverings we learn to put around things we say, and just tell it as it is. That's one of the problems - with dementia, there is nothing the sufferer can do, either about their situation, or often, as a means of passing the time.
In a way, she may actually be reassuring you, but saying - "no, don't worry", but in different words. Don't always take her words at face value.
Best wishes
I'm pleased that things posted on TP are useful to you.
I'd like to stress that you aren't being a nuisance at all!!!!
Learning more is what TP is all about, and if we were not ALL being 'nuisances' then there would be nothing here to see.
About what Mum says - no, she isn't trying to hurt you, but she does know what she is saying. People with dementia strip away all the sugary coverings we learn to put around things we say, and just tell it as it is. That's one of the problems - with dementia, there is nothing the sufferer can do, either about their situation, or often, as a means of passing the time.
In a way, she may actually be reassuring you, but saying - "no, don't worry", but in different words. Don't always take her words at face value.
Best wishes
Dear Lulu, glad we have helped, that is what keeps us posting, to help others and share experiences. Never feel you are a nuisance - 'cause you 'ain't! The whole purpose of TP is helping ordinary folk deal with a nightmare of a problem. We all just speak from our own experience and try to help each other, thats it. You asked where to start, I rang around nursing homes in our area, asked did they take dementia sufferers. If they did, then I went and checked them out without Mum. If I liked what I saw, (can give you more info when you are nearer to doing it) I asked if they did respite and if they had a waiting list. Mum went to the one I liked best for a respite and loved it so I put her name on the waiting list. This was on the understanding that they would let me know of any vacancy and I would say when I needed to take it up. I also put her name down for the one that I liked second too. It gave me peace of mind. Take care, love She. XX
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