Fresh Suggestions Please

dedicated doe

Registered User
Aug 24, 2007
47
wirral merseyside
HI Again,hope you dont mind me being here once more,Dave has been having a few bad days feeling anxious confused and irritable with himself,all he is doing is watching the same old film over and over again (really tiresome for me sorry to say ) I tried to talk to him about doing something else to maybe keep him alittle occupied but all the things i suggested reached nowhere,his music he wont use as it is not keeping the voices away and he is fed up answering them so he tells me,he will just wander aimlessly, please have any other friends out there any ideas how they manage and if there are other suggestions i can use just to help him alittle.God Bless Doe.
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
Hi Doe.


all he is doing is watching the same old film over and over again
I do remember when my mother use to do that, went on for weekssss and I mean weeks , weeks ,

Only thing that may help , is taking him out for a coffee , walk , but then we back to a catch 22 because as soon as mum got home the Video had to be put on again , over , over over , that I learn that the Video rewinds it self back and I would have to start it all over again, if I never she would not settle

But what really did the trick to stop it , was when she was given medication called Exbixa .

The video was called The 3 Man. you could always Hide the film from him ( but that may sound cruel )
 
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BeckyJan

Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
18,972
Derbyshire
Hello:
This is such a difficult one to answer. My husband is older but I still have a similar problem. My husband does not watch or follow tv or dvds. but he does read - the same book over and over again. He does not like noise or music :mad: so what can one do?

In the early days of Alz, he did sort out a stamp collection. I have now bought new folders and sheets for him to sort out photos - but he will only do this if I lead him.

Other suggestions that have been put to me are:

colouring or painting (it is possible to get colouring sheets online - will locate this if you want)
jigsaws
crosswords
cleaning brasses and silver (did not work for us)

I hope you find something but do not be disappointed. It seems to be a problem with Alz. that the sufferer will not easily take to new activities.

Best wishes Jan
 

gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
66
East Midlands
same old film over and over again
Hello Doe,

I'm afraid I also have this problem with my husband...and it does become tiresome!!!
But as Jan says anything new isn't an option..the concentration /memory isn't there..

I have no solutions except maybe to try the things Jan has mentioned. It may be a phase..I do remember having a "musicals" phase and nothing else would do-that does seem to have passed for now. Problem is he'll forget that he watched a film yesterday..

Wishing you both well...Love Gigi x
 

cathy baldwin

Registered User
Jan 21, 2008
8
Central Office
I just wanted to say that I understand how frustrating this must be for you and as you quite rightly say, tiresome! It is easy for us to point out why someone might be doing something in theory but quite something else to live with the reality of it day in day out!

I wish there was some easy remedy for situations like this but unfortunately there is not - all the suggestions that have been made are good and worth trying, I can say that what works today may not work tomorrow but then again what doesn't work today is worth trying tomorrow!

Sometimes repetetive behaviour like this helps the person feel secure in engaging in something that is comfortable and familiar to them - in a sense holding on to what we might see as 'normality'? There is also the fact that while you may be sick and tired of the same film, for the person with dementia with short term memory difficulties, each time they watch it may feel like a new experience to them?

Distraction is always a more favourable option than confrontation, are there things that you can do together? Looking at old photographs, taking a walk, going out for a coffee?
 

gigi

Registered User
Nov 16, 2007
7,788
66
East Midlands
Hello Cathy,

Distraction is always a more favourable option than confrontation, are there things that you can do together? Looking at old photographs, taking a walk, going out for a coffee?
We're working through the old photos together at the moment but my husband soon loses interest...5 or 10 mins maximum

He will not walk-struggles to get round the house these days

On occasions we go for lunch or coffee-but you can't do that every day..when we do it's never what he wants...food's awful..too hot..too cold..too expensive..

Sometimes I think our own guilt puts us in these situations..all he seems to want to do is watch TV..and he sleeps..today I asked him if he was bored..he said " No..I just don't understand why I sleep as much as I do"...

His world has changed. The way he interprets things has changed. Naturally I have concerns because his mobility is so reduced-but I'm more concerned that he is happy/comfortable/cared for and cherished...he no longer needs the mental stimulation that I need.

I agree re confrontation..never have..never would..but I also know it can try the patience of the carer...and up till now I don't really think mine has been tested..however..that day may yet come.

Cathy,you're so right..there is no easy remedy. Each situation is unique..

The good thing is that we have TP to share our concerns/frustrations/ideas..and the odd good time too.

Love Gigi xx
 

dedicated doe

Registered User
Aug 24, 2007
47
wirral merseyside
Thanks for your replies

HI Again,thanks for your replies,it is still a problem on how to get Dave interested in other things but i will keep trying as we all do,some of the things suggested we have tried out but his concentration is poor so its probably best to just take day to day,i am so thankful for TP it is of great support.God Bless Doe.
 

Lynne

Registered User
Jun 3, 2005
3,433
Suffolk,England
Hello Doe,
I'm afraid I also have this problem with my husband...and it does become tiresome!!!
But as Jan says anything new isn't an option..the concentration /memory isn't there..
However, other films don't have to be anything "New".
This year I was doing all my Xmas shopping in the charity shops, and found that because so many people are going over to DVDs they are giving their old videos away. & a lot of them are good old or classic films or series, for example Morecambe & Wise, 2 Ronnies, Porridge; Sound of Music, The King & I, The Dambusters, Reach for the Sky, James Bond Films.
In other words 10 or 20 year old things which may still be within the memory range of a dementia sufferer. They only cost about £1 each from the charity shops, & you are helping someone else along the way. Just a thought.

Best wishes
 

cariad

Registered User
Sep 29, 2007
89
Hello!
If he likes watching films, why not suggest a trip to the local video rental shop or library (mine stocks dvds). Maybe there are other films he would like to watch. At least the trip would break the monotony of watching the same old film.