@Grannie G yes, my aunt has been in touch. Not right away but I think at some point she realized she had no one else. She calls every couple of months and is busy offering me recipes. We stay away from discussing Mum and the nursing home. The odd time she starts on one of her rants I get off the phone quickly.
My sister and BIL visited at Christmas last year and we took my aunt out for lunch. My eyes were extremely bad at the time and my aunt went on and on about how my specialist was no good and how I should go see her doctor. I hadn't even seen the specialist at that point. And I certainly wasn't about to travel 30 miles to see a doctor when the one I needed was 5 miles away. She fixated on how horrible my eyes looked. At that point, it was the blurriness and constant feeling of grit in the eyes which bothered me.
But overall I have achieved some balance. She still can make me crazy faster than anyone on the planet but I do try and remember she has absolutely no one else in her life. She is the last of her siblings, divorced 40 years ago and no children. I basically am it. My sister is 350 miles away and she is not in touch with my other cousins.