forgetting how to use things

Macaroon

New member
Jun 13, 2018
1
0
My mum has early onset dementia,and was diagnosed about 18 months ago. She’s refused help of any kind and can seem quite lucid at times. I take her shopping on a Saturday and she’ll sometimes forget what she put in her trolley five minutes before. I get back to her house and her fridge and cupboards are full of the previous weeks shopping. What is she eating? I call her every night and she’ll tell me she’s had bacon and egg, when I know we didn’t buy bacon and egg. Her Tv is always on the same channel, sometime when I call her she’ll put the phone down and say she couldn’t here me. I’m questioning if it’s her phone that’s not working or if she switches off or has forgotten that I’m there. Is this normal? Everything seems to be happening very quickly.
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
25,081
0
South coast
Yes, quite normal, Im afraid.
You take her shopping, but she cant remember what she needs. Mum had bought so many toiletries that you could have opened a chemists with them.
You ask her what she had for dinner and she cant remember, so tells you the first thing that pops into her head. Mum used to do this, but in fact she had not eaten anything at all because she could no longer remember how to cook.
Her TV is always on the same channel because she cant remember how to use the remote. Mum used to regularly tell me that her TV was broken, but she had just pressed a wrong button on the remote.
She puts the phone down on you because she can no longer understand what is happening. Mum used to do the same - she would say "I cant understand you - get off my phone" and put the phone down. Im not sure that she realised that it was me.

It sounds like your mum could do with more supervision: perhaps making out a shopping list for/with her before you take her out shopping: perhaps ready meals might make things easier for meals: perhaps an easier remote https://www.amazon.co.uk/Flipper-Big-Button-Universal-Remote-White/dp/B002GR1YZ0 - similar available elsewhere.
 

kindred

Registered User
Apr 8, 2018
2,938
0
Yes, quite normal, Im afraid.
You take her shopping, but she cant remember what she needs. Mum had bought so many toiletries that you could have opened a chemists with them.
You ask her what she had for dinner and she cant remember, so tells you the first thing that pops into her head. Mum used to do this, but in fact she had not eaten anything at all because she could no longer remember how to cook.
Her TV is always on the same channel because she cant remember how to use the remote. Mum used to regularly tell me that her TV was broken, but she had just pressed a wrong button on the remote.
She puts the phone down on you because she can no longer understand what is happening. Mum used to do the same - she would say "I cant understand you - get off my phone" and put the phone down. Im not sure that she realised that it was me.

It sounds like your mum could do with more supervision: perhaps making out a shopping list for/with her before you take her out shopping: perhaps ready meals might make things easier for meals: perhaps an easier remote https://www.amazon.co.uk/Flipper-Big-Button-Universal-Remote-White/dp/B002GR1YZ0 - similar available elsewhere.
Oh much sympathy. My OH would repeat buy. When I started to turn out cupboards, I found over thirty screw drivers, goodness knows how many black felt tip markers and dozens of rolls of duct tape. I think this is also a signal of dementia. Some PWD hoard as well, stuff in cardboard boxes, plastic bags etc and they have no idea whata they are hoarding. Gxx
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
3,634
0
TV remote, washing machine, hob, microwave, mobile phone, CD player, DVD player the list goes on, the ability to write a list, the ability to boil an egg, get cash out of the cash machine. It's endless, he looks in the fridge to see what he needs, shuts the door and then has to look in there again forgetting why he looked in the first place. Couldn't get on a bus if he could find the bus stop.

Drives me potty.
 

kindred

Registered User
Apr 8, 2018
2,938
0
TV remote, washing machine, hob, microwave, mobile phone, CD player, DVD player the list goes on, the ability to write a list, the ability to boil an egg, get cash out of the cash machine. It's endless, he looks in the fridge to see what he needs, shuts the door and then has to look in there again forgetting why he looked in the first place. Couldn't get on a bus if he could find the bus stop.

Drives me potty.
Yes, I know, all sympathy, been through this with my OH. I know how it drives us mad, does our heads in. My OH tried to eat the tv remote, I think he thought it was a mars bar. Gxx
 

nellbelles

Volunteer Host
Nov 6, 2008
9,843
0
leicester
Hi @Macaroon a warm welcome from me as well.
When you have had a good look around the site and digested some of the information from other posters maybe you should start to consider some extra help for your Mum at home?
 

rainbowcat

Registered User
Oct 14, 2015
139
0
She puts the phone down on you because she can no longer understand what is happening. Mum used to do the same - she would say "I cant understand you - get off my phone" and put the phone down.

Yes - my father literally today was shouting "WHY AREN'T YOU SPEAKING ENGLISH?!" at me down the phone. He's also very good at holding the earpiece to his EYEBROW and then shouts that he can't hear me (we have a cam in his room that we can view).
 

Loisand

Registered User
Dec 25, 2017
135
0
Just reading through the above....all I can say is ditto to everyone....Mom has an eye clinic appointment this morning, so when she first awoke I put on her bed her clean clothes, explained three times what order to put them on, laid them out in the order.....she came downstairs, yes she had her clean trousers on, but her top and cardigan was completely different....passed the comment of "you look nice, but where are the clothes that you were supposed to put on".....no reply, I went up to her bedroom to discover them all rolled into a ball under the chair.....she swears blind she never put them there.....I do alot of counting to ten ha but now its more like thirty....still have at least 12 hours before her bedtime keep smiling everyone xx
 

Rolypoly

Registered User
Jan 15, 2018
2,319
0
Just reading through the above....all I can say is ditto to everyone....Mom has an eye clinic appointment this morning, so when she first awoke I put on her bed her clean clothes, explained three times what order to put them on, laid them out in the order.....she came downstairs, yes she had her clean trousers on, but her top and cardigan was completely different....passed the comment of "you look nice, but where are the clothes that you were supposed to put on".....no reply, I went up to her bedroom to discover them all rolled into a ball under the chair.....she swears blind she never put them there.....I do alot of counting to ten ha but now its more like thirty....still have at least 12 hours before her bedtime keep smiling everyone xx


Different clothes is a regular occurrence here. :rolleyes:
 

Cazzita

Registered User
May 12, 2018
617
0
Oh how all these things resonate with me at the moment! My mum was hoarding and buying random stuff she didn't need etc but now that we are staying with her, it is all under control - well almost! It's so weird that they forget to do basic things - my mum no longer clears up after herself, doesn't take cups to the sink etc , never uses the phone but so far is okay with the tv. Today she bought a dress in Laura Ashley and half an hour later had no idea that she had done that. She has no idea of what clothes she has anymore and another change I have noticed lately is that she used to pace up and down the stairs, all around the house but now she sits in one seat in front of the tv all day - or would if I let her! Today she was told she has diabetes and is almost at the 'danger' level, plus she is so overweight now and she is adamant she won't stop eating chocolate and crisps as 'nothing tastes as good as they do!'
So sad to see all these changes and they are coming quicker than I thought they would too and we are still waiting for the result of the CT scan...so no disgnosis as yet. Good luck everyone to is dealing with this or going through it x