I used to get very wound up about not being able to get a Flu jab, even if I offered to pay for it. Before Mum went into a Care Home, I did have the rather "parenoid" feeling that everybody went out of their way to make life as difficult as possible for me.
I work afternoons and evenings and I am self employed, so I do not get sick pay or paid time off. Although I was free in the mornings, Mum's doctor was only available for emergency appointments in the morning. Taking Mum to the doctor meant either losing a day's work, or getting my husband to take her, or taking her in as an emergency and wasting the entire morning. Mum sometimes needed three or four appointments a month, so this was a big issue for me.
It was also very inconvenient getting medication, as they changed the system and you could only get 28 days supply at a time. It was a real headache trying to co-ordinate all Mum's various drugs so that they needed to be renewed at the same time. Then the chemist would not have everything and I'd have to keep going back to fetch the rest of the prescription.
When my husband and I were both suffering from bad flu-like colds, I rang the doctors to see if a district nurse could call in and check Mum's medication, and help get her repeat prescription. It was cold and icy at the time and the roads were quite slippery and neither of us felt up to driving. There is no emergency system in this area to check on elderly people in an emergency. In the end we just had to risk driving when feeling unwell.
It would have made the world of difference to me if there had been even just the tiniest bit of support from the NHS. Perhaps if the doctor had called at the house or appointments could have been arranged at convenient times. All the stress of trying to fit in working for a living, with caring for a dependent person takes a toll on health and well being.
Also when Social Workers dismiss everything you try to do by saying, "Oh you're not actually a Carer then, as you don't live in the same house." I felt like I was being treated as a non-person, who didn't count for anything. A phone call would not cost much, and it would be a great encouragement to people and help them to resolve any problems. My Mum, like many others has very complex health problems and for many years has needed a lot of medical care and attention which has really stretched my abilty to cope.
I'm just feeling now, that I actually have some time to be myself, and now I don't need to worry about day to day issues with Mum, I can spend quality time with her and talk to her, while she is still able to hold a conversation.
However I will have to work hard to get back as much work as I had before Mum started falling down and needing attention. Our finances are really feeling the pinch.
Kayla