Hi, This is my first post and is probably going to be very long and rambling (sorry about this). I am trying to get everything clear in my head as I type but I’m a bit of a butterfly brain so it may jump about a bit. My dad has AD which (I believe) was diagnosed nearly two years ago, though his memory had been getting noticeably worse for at least a year before that. I am unaware what, if any, medical help he is being given, though I know he is taking no drugs for the AD. He does see his gp pretty often for other things though. My mother is also very confused, though I think this has a lot to do with worrying over my dad, so it is impossible to get any factual information about his condition or what professionals have said. Her stories change and are sometimes definitely untrue. I live over 200 miles away so don’t see them too often. They came to visit this week and he was noticeably worse. For example, not remembering that my Mum lives with him, constantly checking his watch, fretting over a meal not being instantly available, not knowing where he is and wanting to go home to bed. Lots of other things as well, in general he is very, very vague and confused. I have various worries about them; my first concern at the moment is about him still driving. My mother insists he is still safe, though I don’t think she is a reliable judge. I haven’t been in a car with him driving for a couple of years but even then I remember him making mistakes like not giving way when he should. I know he has started getting lost on various journeys, including one or two he has done regularly, and forgets simple things like how to use the wipers or the lights. At least three times recently the car has received minor bumps (my Mum says caused by other people in car parks, I KNOW in at least one case this is untrue). What can I do to make sure he is safe to drive? I don’t think he should, but surely there is some sort of official assessment that could be made whether by his gp, or someone else. How can I do something about this (and I really would prefer that my parents didn’t know I was behind it – cowardly I know). My second major concern is for my mother. She seems finally to be accepting the diagnosis, and is in tears a lot of the time (her mother had AD for 10 years so she does understand how it progresses). I think she needs to start looking after herself more, and to start getting out and doing more things independently. However she has always built her life round my Dad and done everything for him. She constantly tries to cover up his condition even to family. Apart from occasions when she breaks down completely I don’t believe she confides in anyone. We have never been the sort of family who “talks” about things, and I find it virtually impossible to start now, we’ve just never had that sort of relationship. She isn’t coping well, and is very confused herself. When they came to visit (by train) they arrived a day early (very typical), so there was no-one to meet them at the station. She didn’t phone anyone, or seemingly ask for any help at the station. I finally received an anserphone message from someone at the station (presumably a good Samaritan who had seen her crying), and then I went to collect them. She insisted they hadn’t spoken to anyone and couldn’t understand how we had just ‘appeared’. She is a bag of nerves and doesn’t remember major things. This isn’t the first time something like this has happened, we once had to report them missing to the police. Basically, I think I am asking, what sort of practical/emotional help can she get? No family live particularly close and she doesn’t seem to be asking for any help so far, but obviously isn’t coping well. I am sure that there lots more things I will think of as soon as I post this, but some pointers to get me started would be great. Sorry I’ve gone a bit ( I could probably ramble on a lot longer if I thought some more!!). Thanks anyway for taking the time to read this.