Hi All, I am relatively new to this so please bear with me . Mum was diagnosed with ad 2 years ago ish though symptoms for many years. Dad has cared for her brilliantly even though being really poorly himself , he never wanted any external support , refused any financial help too., so proud as his generation were. During his many stays in hospital recently he consistently said he wanted to pay myself or sibling to help care for her, sibling does not want to take on that role and and I completely understand . Dad kind of unexpectedly passed away 9 weeks ago . I had been having mum to my home for 18 months for the day to give him a break and so when he died I moved mum in and she settled well as familiar and she adores my dog who gives her enormous happiness . My hubby and I both self employed and I had taken a lot of time off in the last few months to care for him and mum. I quit work the day he died . Subsequently we are really struggling financially without my income . She will be self funding but I can’t get her to agree to carers or a day centre so I can return to a little work, dad never wanted a stranger to care for mum but I have to do what’s right for all of us now Should I get her in a day centre so I can go back to work or can I draw money from her estate to cover loss of earnings ? Sorry if this sounds harsh. I am slightly worried about how quickly our debts are mounting up. Any help /advice greatly welcomed . Woohoo .