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Final days


Registered User
Aug 1, 2014
I posted this on the end of one of my old threads in another section but I think this is the correct section to post it in....

MIL died a couple of weeks ago - her nightmare and ours is finally over. She was taken to hospital with stomach pains and vomitting and they discovered a bowel problem which needed an operation. As she was so frail they decided that she would not survive the anaesthetic and we made the painful descision to withdraw all treatment and fluids except pain relief. Thankfully after the first few days she was in a coma and comfortable. The pallative care staff were fantastic and we spent 5 days at the hosital with her all day and every day just holding her hands and talking and singing to her. On the final day we had the priest give her the last rights and about 20 minutes after his visit she took her last breath with my husband and i holding her hands.

It has been a very long and painful journey and a very traumatic end with feelings of relief its finally over for her and of course guilt for wanting it to be for her and our tormented family. But i can honestly say we did everything in our power above and beyond the norm to help and care for her so take comfort in that. Funeral is next week.

Thank you to anyone who has ever posted to me during these dark days and i wish you all peace and better days x


Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
I'm sorry to read your news. I'm glad you were with your MIL when she passed. Wishing you strength in the days and weeks to come.


Registered User
Aug 1, 2014
Thank you all. The pallative care team were wonderful, always attentive to make sure she was comfortable and so kind. MIL was such a kind and giving person and the nurses said even in death she was helping people as they were using a new intravenous automatic pain reliever pump on her for which they had all had the training but she was their first patient to use it on so she taught them all how to use it.

No flowers at the funeral except for the siblings - all donations instead going to the Alzheimer's research program, so shes still helping even from beyond the grave god bless her.


Registered User
Jan 19, 2011
North East England
I'm so sorry to hear your sad news, please accept my condolences. It's nice that you feel your MiL still helped, and continues to help, the fight against dementia. What a positive outlook. Big hugs to you and your family.