Feeling sorry for myself

[di65]

I have had a very melancholy day. Here in NZ it is the evening of Valentines Day and I am sitting here with a cuppa and a slab of cake (comfort food). The television, the radio and the newspapers are full of Valentines Day and happy, loving couples and it has made me so sad. I went to visit Lex this morning and took him some of his favourite flowers (dahlias) from the garden. He looked at them and then carried on having his morning tea. It could have been any day, but I'm not complaining about that, as he didn't normally give me flowers "before".
I went on Facebook, which is also full of friends wishing everyone Happy Valentines Day, and even one of a photo of some dear friends out for a meal with champagne and red roses.
I then decided to watch 24 hours in A&E, only to have them have a dementia patient as one of patients. I just feel so overwhelmed today - I just want to curl up in a ball and cry.


Sorry to burden you with my feelings, but I know that many of you will feel the same at times like this.

 

[Cat27]

Oh Di I'm so sorry you're feeling sad. Sending you love & hugs xx

 

[di65]

Oh Di I'm so sorry you're feeling sad. Sending you love & hugs xx

Thank you Cat, I think that's exactly what I need - someone to hug. God, how I miss that .......

 

[Grannie G]

I`m also going through a feeling sorry for myself time di, nothing to do with Valentines Day, more to do with every day.

You are not burdening anyone with your feelings, you are sharing them with those who know how it is.

You may be alone as far as Lex is concerned and no one can make up for that. You are not alone as far as TP is concerned , it`s second best I know but its here.

 

[LadyA]

It seems there are particular times - and VAlentines Day is one of them - which really shove "alone-ness" in our faces, doesn't it? All around, advertising works to convince us that the entire world (except us) is happy in cozy coupledom - and we know it's not true, but the images can still make us feel very alone. I usually buy myself some flowers (can't have chocolate or cake) and a small treat of some kind. The same at times like anniversaries - these are times to do something nice for yourself, in honour of yourself and hour husband. Even if he doesn't remember anymore. If it's something we would have celebrated together - then I go on doing something nice for it myself, because the celebration is still valid, even if one of us is no longer here.

Hugs to you di65. It's not easy.

 

[cragmaid]

I know it's nothing like the same but.... 46 years married and I'm sitting here opposite OH, whom I love dearly and I he loves me..... and I'm still waiting for the first Valentine Wish of our association.....

It's an overrated, over-commercial festival..... ( that's what I'm telling myself)


((((((((((( Great big squishy hugs))))))))))) to all those needing them.x.x.x.x

 

[Grannie G]

Dhiren and I never acknowledged Valentine`s Day until he was way into his dementia.

In conversation, I said I had never received a Valentine`s card. He asked if I would have liked to and I replied I would.

`You`ll have one this year.` he said. And I did.

 

[Amlama88]

I have had a very melancholy day. Here in NZ it is the evening of Valentines Day and I am sitting here with a cuppa and a slab of cake (comfort food). The television, the radio and the newspapers are full of Valentines Day and happy, loving couples and it has made me so sad. I went to visit Lex this morning and took him some of his favourite flowers (dahlias) from the garden. He looked at them and then carried on having his morning tea. It could have been any day, but I'm not complaining about that, as he didn't normally give me flowers "before".
I went on Facebook, which is also full of friends wishing everyone Happy Valentines Day, and even one of a photo of some dear friends out for a meal with champagne and red roses.
I then decided to watch 24 hours in A&E, only to have them have a dementia patient as one of patients. I just feel so overwhelmed today - I just want to curl up in a ball and cry.


Sorry to burden you with my feelings, but I know that many of you will feel the same at times like this.

I get these kind of feelings when i hear a love song, i feel so sad that my mum is still young and she wont get the chance to grow old happily and content with my dad because of his alzeimers which seems to have deteriorated massively im recent months. I'm so sorry you feel this way and sending big hugs. Try and remember the good times, i know its easier said than done though xx

 

[Spamar]

(((((Hugs))))) Di, it's a b..... isn't it? There are times when only cake and a cry will help, so don't fret too much. But something trivial caused me to sob my heart out a couple of days ago, so I do understand!
Thinking of you, S.

 

[canary]

Im sitting here and OH is in the conservatory on his tablet - as usual! There have been no comments about Valentines Day, no cards, flowers or anything. I dont think he realises that its that day.

It's an overrated, over-commercial festival..... ( that's what I'm telling myself)

Thats what Im telling myself too

 

[Sweetsheep]

Hugs to you and everyone who needs it! ❤❤❤❤

Sent from my SM-G930F using Talking Point mobile app

 

[irismary]

Sad isn't it. We always did cards and presents for valentines day but its not quite the same if you have to get your own is it. I have given up doing it - at Christmas I got out last years. When I picked up my husband from day club though they gave me a card from him. Not sure how much he did of it, he certainly didn't write it as he can't now and he couldn't remember making it but it was nice of the staff though. I'd trade all the cards and presents I've ever had for a proper conversation with the real him.

 

[nellbelles]

I think a lot of hugs are needed for so many of us at the moment

Wonder if EBay would do a job lot for us all

 

[jan.s]

I think a lot of hugs are needed for so many of us at the moment

Wonder if EBay would do a job lot for us all

I'll put in the order to eBay now, Helen. Sending hugs to all who are feeling sad for whatever reason.

We always celebrated Valentines Day with love and laughter

 

[di65]

Thank you all I know I can rely on TP for a lift in spirits if I need it.

Valentines Day seems to the worst. Wedding anniversaries are always noted by family and close friends, and at Christmas is always a busy time and filled with family, so not much time to wallow in self pity

Feeling a bit better this morning, and I'm of to a carers morning tea which will be a lovely time. These events are growing and the new people seem to be getting a lot out of them

Again, thank you all - and sending hugs back to everyone

Di

 

[Izzy]

Sorry, just found this thread. Sorry you're feeling so down Di. Sylvia is right a lot of people seem to be feeling that way just now.

Bill and I always did exchange Valentines until much later in his illness.

Today I had coffee with my usual Tuesday friends - all connected through dementia. One couple came in and the husband (who has dementia) had a bunch of red roses. He gave each one of us 'single' ladies a single red rose! What a very kind thought. His wife obviously had the idea but he was so chuffed at giving them out and we were so chuffed at getting them. My one is alongside one of my photos of Bill.

Another of my friends (who lost her husband to cancer a few years ago) send me a Facebook message saying she was thinking of me on what might be a difficult day. She send a smiley of a heart.

Such kind friends!

Hope everyone has a peaceful night.

 

[dancer12]

I have had a very melancholy day. Here in NZ it is the evening of Valentines Day and I am sitting here with a cuppa and a slab of cake (comfort food). The television, the radio and the newspapers are full of Valentines Day and happy, loving couples and it has made me so sad. I went to visit Lex this morning and took him some of his favourite flowers (dahlias) from the garden. He looked at them and then carried on having his morning tea. It could have been any day, but I'm not complaining about that, as he didn't normally give me flowers "before".
I went on Facebook, which is also full of friends wishing everyone Happy Valentines Day, and even one of a photo of some dear friends out for a meal with champagne and red roses.
I then decided to watch 24 hours in A&E, only to have them have a dementia patient as one of patients. I just feel so overwhelmed today - I just want to curl up in a ball and cry.


Sorry to burden you with my feelings, but I know that many of you will feel the same at times like this.

Hi Di65

It is one of the worst days of the year. I try to remind myself it is only a made up day by the card & flower companies to increase revenue, but it still hurts. The world seems to have caught onto this day so well. Let us make a day for ourselves. We will call it - LOVE ONES REMEMBERED DAY (LORD) and it shall be everyday of every year.

Many hugs to you and all others, WE WILL STAND TOGETHER ON THIS DAY & ALWAYS.