1. snuffyuk

    snuffyuk Registered User

    Jul 8, 2004
    188
    Near Bristol
    Hello
    I do not a wealth of friends. One friend who I worked with at an out of school club and used to come and give my mum a hairdo once a fortnight died yesterday at the age of 48.
    I truly believe she was totally let down by the NHS from local doctors to the local hospital.
    mum is very hyper tonight and I think why did my friend die so young yet my mum is still alive .
     
  2. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hi Snuffy

    we all get down at times like this. There is no rhyme or reason to life and we just have to make the most of our time, enjoy things on a minute by minute basis because we never know when things will change.

    Things can get better as well as worse, so keep a little optimistic window open somewhere. [or a big one!

    It is very hard when younger people die - or get something like dementia.

    Today, at Jan's home, I was sitting talking to her but was getting no response, and another resident at her home, a lovely old lady walked up to us. She is aged 95, yet far less advanced than Jan in her condition. She can see, walk, talk, feed herself - none of which Jan can do. We exchanged a few words, and she asked me "will Jan get better". I said, no, and the lady replied "it would be beter if Jesus came for her then, if she won't get better".

    Not much one can say to that!
     
  3. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Dear Snuffy, the death of your good friend is a terrible blow to you, please accept my deepest sympathy. You must be feeling so sad right now, I found that often my Mum also, was hyper when I was particularly down, almost as though she picked up on my mood some how. Life is very unfair at times, your friend was too young to die, no wonder you are feeling as you do. I hope she did not suffer? Sending you a big hug and thinking of you, love She. XX
     
  4. Jude

    Jude Registered User

    Dear Snuffy,

    One of my best friends died when he was 31 years old in a stupid accident. It was such an awful shock and it look me a long time to comes to terms with losing him. He was young and so vibrant and it seemed such an utter waste...

    You have my sympathy.

    Jude
     
  5. snuffyuk

    snuffyuk Registered User

    Jul 8, 2004
    188
    Near Bristol
    thankyou all for your messages,
    Yes she did suffer but died peacefully thank ??? !!!
    snuffyuk
     
  6. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Snuffy
    it's always sad too lose a good friend,we don't have many left do we when AD is around?
    A good friend of ours died recently,He had been a Methodist lay preacher for over 40 years,and one of the kindest men one could ever wish to meet
    I never heard him say an unkind word about anyone and he always looked for the good in people.
    He died in a hospice,suffered awfully at the end,I will miss him.
    Why Snuffy why do the good ones suffer,why do our loved ones have too suffer?
    A bit down today,will be better tomorrow
    Thinking of you
    Norman
     
  7. snuffyuk

    snuffyuk Registered User

    Jul 8, 2004
    188
    Near Bristol
    thankyou for the message. Sorry you feel down.
    Hot bath, hot cup of Horlicks and a good book.
    Sleep well
    snuffy
     
  8. snuffyuk

    snuffyuk Registered User

    Jul 8, 2004
    188
    Near Bristol
    well today was my friends funeral

    The church was 3/4 full and more than expected.

    then the Crematorium which i did not attend.
    My friends ashes are to be "scattered" on a local hill called "Knowle Tump" .she was born nearby and loved the area.
    Gutted and so sad tonight
    snuffy
     
  9. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Snuffy, wrap my arms around you and feel comforted.......Your dear friend must feel truely blessed to know that they are so missed........My love and good wishes go with you, wee have so few true friends, Love Connie
     
  10. Jude

    Jude Registered User

    Dear Snuffy,

    My thoughts are with you and your dear friend tonight from Cairns.

    Jude xxx
     
  11. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Snuffy
    thinking of you and your sad loss
    Norman
     
  12. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Dear Snuffy, a friendship like the one you had with your friend is a very special thing. Treasure the memories, that way she will never really be gone, because you will always have her safe in your heart. Thinking of you, sending you love and hugs, wish I could do something to help, She. XX
     
  13. sanvalthur

    sanvalthur Registered User

    Mar 13, 2005
    6
    Oxford/London
    Feel sad - think of good memories

    Hi snuffy -

    Know how U feel. We lost a very good friend who was only 25. He was someone who loved life, had many interests, and was the most vibrant, fun person I've ever known. Were devastated by his death, which was long-drawn out and awful. Can't explain why he died, and my mother-in-law (94, with Altzheimers) is still going strong. She talks all the time about wishing she could simply go to sleep and never wake up. I wish she could too, since I wish her that dignity instead of what happened to our friend.

    The best advice I was given by someone else, is that whenever you feel sad, or feel full of grief, think of a GOOD memory of that person - remember a time when you laughed together, or had fun - and I promise U that helps a lot. Surely, when YOU die, you won't want people to feel sad every time they think of you? Wouldn't you rather they had happy memories of you? Think of it this way and it will help; the pain will never go away, but the good memories will eventually outweigh the bad - and the sadness will be tempered with happy memories.

    Best regards,

    Sandra
     
  14. snuffyuk

    snuffyuk Registered User

    Jul 8, 2004
    188
    Near Bristol
    don't think anyone will have happy thoughts about me.
     
  15. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hi Snuffy

    I think you under-rate yourself.

    You would be surprised at the number of people that you know well, and that you may feel you know very little, who will think a good deal of you.

    We go through really bad times - I know, I've been there, come out, and sometimes [like this afternoon] returned, however briefly. It is an awful situation, but do hold on to a high opinion of yourself.

    For you to feel so strongly about your friend, they must have felt strongly for you. And there will be others who feel strongly for you too, though they may not always say it.

    Finally, there are those of us on TP who also think about you.

    Happier times will come, once we have all got over our present sad times. We need to hang on in there, and can all help each other to do that.

    Best wishes
     
  16. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Snuffy
    I think you would be surprised if you knew how many peaple care about you.
    You are a caring person and caring people at tract love.
    Your family on here love you
    kind thoughts
    Norman :)
     
  17. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Dear snuffy, I can only echo Norman's thoughts. You are admired and loved here on TP. One day you will emerge into the sunshine. love Connie :)
     
  18. Sheila

    Sheila Registered User

    Oct 23, 2003
    2,259
    West Sussex
    Dear Snuffy, your posts are full of love and feeling for others, we feel the same about you, you are a good friend to us all now, and you have much wisdom to help others. Don't under estimate the good you do, I know you have helped me. The sun will come out with time, I know because I too am waiting for it with baited breath, but I am sure it will for all of us, love and hugs, She. XX
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.