I joined this forum some time ago when we were just at the start of investigating Mum's forgetfulness. I read some very sad stories and felt really fortunate that Mum was clearly a lot less affected than some of your loved ones. I almost felt a fraud for joining you as Mum was only mildly affected but in the last couple of months things have progressed rapidly.
Mum was diagnosed with dementia, 7 months after we first saw a specialist, which we were told will progress to full blown Alzheimers eventually (although I would be grateful if someone could tell me the difference).
After enquiring about medication to help slow down the progress we were told that Mum would be referred to the Specialist Nurse team who would come out and assess Mum, give her the medication and then return periodically to see if it was making any difference. This would take around 2 months.
2 months on I rang the team to find out where Mum was on the list. It seems she is number 109 and they are currently dealing with number 5 who was referred in November..... this could be a very long wait. Meanwhile Mum has deteriorated rapidly becoming very verbally aggressive, sulking when she doesn't remember something or when she takes an innocent comment the wrong way , forgetfulness is definitely much worse and the brunt of this is taken by Dad who at 85, still very active and still mentally intact, is simply an angel. He copes far better than I ever would and I admire him so much for his patience. I really feel for him as it is very hard for him to see his life partner changing into someone he doesn't know anymore.
I am currently still pushing for the Specialist Nurse although I already feel any help will be too late to be of any real use.
Dad will not leave Mum alone any more, although having said that they have not done things separately for years now and so I think he does not know what to do with himself given the opportunity to take a break of an hour or two. I have offered to stay with Mum or take her out but she isn't interested and Dad can't think what to do with himself on his own.
Mum has now got terrible sores on her legs and arms through continually picking at them. She just cannot leave them alone and it seems to be something she does without realising. They won't heal because she continually picks at them.
I think Dad may also be entitled to Attendance Allowance but would value some advice as to where is the best place to go to investigate this further.
I realise than my woes are nothing to what some of you are going through but this is all new to me and feels like a mountain of unknown territory.
I've read that you should not take the verbal abuse personally, that it is the disease and not Mum but sometimes it seems impossible not to be affected by the cruelty Mum dishes out. I have to admit I have great difficulty in ignoring some of the things she says.
So, after my "get it off my chest" rant, any advice on how to cope with this for either my Dad or me would be very gratefully received
Mum was diagnosed with dementia, 7 months after we first saw a specialist, which we were told will progress to full blown Alzheimers eventually (although I would be grateful if someone could tell me the difference).
After enquiring about medication to help slow down the progress we were told that Mum would be referred to the Specialist Nurse team who would come out and assess Mum, give her the medication and then return periodically to see if it was making any difference. This would take around 2 months.
2 months on I rang the team to find out where Mum was on the list. It seems she is number 109 and they are currently dealing with number 5 who was referred in November..... this could be a very long wait. Meanwhile Mum has deteriorated rapidly becoming very verbally aggressive, sulking when she doesn't remember something or when she takes an innocent comment the wrong way , forgetfulness is definitely much worse and the brunt of this is taken by Dad who at 85, still very active and still mentally intact, is simply an angel. He copes far better than I ever would and I admire him so much for his patience. I really feel for him as it is very hard for him to see his life partner changing into someone he doesn't know anymore.
I am currently still pushing for the Specialist Nurse although I already feel any help will be too late to be of any real use.
Dad will not leave Mum alone any more, although having said that they have not done things separately for years now and so I think he does not know what to do with himself given the opportunity to take a break of an hour or two. I have offered to stay with Mum or take her out but she isn't interested and Dad can't think what to do with himself on his own.
Mum has now got terrible sores on her legs and arms through continually picking at them. She just cannot leave them alone and it seems to be something she does without realising. They won't heal because she continually picks at them.
I think Dad may also be entitled to Attendance Allowance but would value some advice as to where is the best place to go to investigate this further.
I realise than my woes are nothing to what some of you are going through but this is all new to me and feels like a mountain of unknown territory.
I've read that you should not take the verbal abuse personally, that it is the disease and not Mum but sometimes it seems impossible not to be affected by the cruelty Mum dishes out. I have to admit I have great difficulty in ignoring some of the things she says.
So, after my "get it off my chest" rant, any advice on how to cope with this for either my Dad or me would be very gratefully received
... which wasn't wrong. They did respond eventually. Keep onj at them you deserve some support.
