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feeling lost myself

amandajane

Registered User
Aug 3, 2013
6
0
norwich
:( my fatherwas dignosed in feb 2013 2 yrs after my mother passed away.
i can not belive how much he has changed, he was once a smart suit man now its jeans and t-shirts he swears and gets so angry at me and then tells me he loves me .he belives he has a girlfriend and tells me albout his sex life!!
phone calls night and day and he vist me 2/3 times a day .
he is now getting cross with my girls and gransons if they are visting me.
i am soooo tired :(
 

jeany123

Registered User
Mar 24, 2012
19,035
0
72
Durham
Hello Amandajane and welcome to Talking Point, I am sorry to hear about your father you must be so upset about this, you have come to the right place for support and advice and I hope you keep posting, some times it helps just to get things down in writing, you will get more replies as people wake up and come online,

Best Wishes Jeany x
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
75,824
0
Kent
Hello amandajane

Have you had any help and advice about managing your father`s behaviour? Do you have a local branch of the Alzheimer`s Society? You can find out here.

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents.php?categoryID=200121

You could also phone the Helpline and speak to someone who might be able to advise you.

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents.php?categoryID=200365

You should not be so tired, be posting at 4am because worry is keeping you awake. Nor should you have sole responsibility for your father`s irrational behaviour. It is too much for anyone.

You can also contact Social Services for a Community Care Assessment.

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=131

There are many ways you can get help but I`m afraid you need to ask. No one knows what you are having to put up with unless you tell them.

Your girls and grandchildren should not have to cope with this behaviour and neither should you.
 

60's child

Registered User
Apr 23, 2013
588
0
suffolk
Hi Amandajane
Welcome to the forum. I am sorry about your Dad. I totally understand how hard it is watching someone change as dementia creeps in. I look after my Mum who has gone from a strong, intelligent capable woman to someone who struggles with basic tasks. It is heartbreaking to watch. Luckily Mum has not yet been rude or cross with family. I would be devastated if that was the case. Please keep posting on here. Everyone understands and there is such a lot of support available and good advice also.
 
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amandajane

Registered User
Aug 3, 2013
6
0
norwich
Thank you for lovely support messages :)
My father had CT scan Sunday afternoon so need to wait for results before Edt will increase his meds.
This is all very new to me but I think he had been struggling for sometime and when I lost my mum it started to show more x
 

amandajane

Registered User
Aug 3, 2013
6
0
norwich
Thank you for lovely support messages :)
My father had CT scan Sunday afternoon so need to wait for results before Edt will increase his meds.
This is all very new to me but I think he had been struggling for sometime and when I lost my mum it started to show more x

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr pleases let today end soon .
 

Nouha

Registered User
Aug 7, 2013
3
0
Hello, I thought a lot about what I was going to write, I don't have a question, nor am I asking for advice, I just needed to talk about this. I read other people's stories about alzheimer in different forums, and I wanted to share mine as well, just to let people know that they're not the only one who are going through this, and that they are, most definitly, understood :) ... All four of my grandparents had alzheimer, only 2 of them were really diagnosed with it, but we just know that the other two have it as well, I'd say that we got so much used to the disease that it's symptomes became cristal clear to us :p ... anyway, my paternal grandparents died some years ago, and now, my maternal ones both have the disease, only that my grandfather is in a late stage of it, He became compeletly dependent on my aunt, in everything. I help my aunt taking care of them, but my grandmother is making it hard on me, my aunt and my other aunts and uncles and on my mom, she still consideres herself the main caregiver to my grandfather and she doesn't even realize that she herself needs care, she yells at him for doing bad things he didn't mean to do, she nags at him so much that he would avoid asing her anything so she won't yell at him.anyway this caused me a depression and I started believing that it was inevitable that I'll have alzheimer too if I'm meant to live that long. And it's even harder on my aunt because she's the one who has to do 95% or even more of the caring process, and she became really depressed and doesn't sleep much. I'm sorry for this long long text, It's been a long while since I talked about this, and I really needed to spell it out.
Ps : to all those who are going though this too, if it's your parents you're taking care of, just remember that they took care of you when you were kids, and even if it's not parents you have to look after, it's not up to them what they do, It's the disease that is making them do this ... and, May God reward you for the care you provide :D
 

Nouha

Registered User
Aug 7, 2013
3
0
To Amandajane

Oh and Amandajane, I'm sorry for what you are going through .. Appearently I was supposed to post my previous comment as a question or something and not as an answer to yours,( I'm sorry I'm new in this forum and didn't pay attention to that ) anyway, I just want you to know that I know what you're talking about, and I know what you must be feeling, but one thing I know, is that your father really needs you right now, and you should probably talk with your daughters and grandsons about your father's disease, the whole family is supposed to be aware of what is happeping with him, so they'd avoid irritationg him, or hurting his feelings. May God help you with that :)
 

amandajane

Registered User
Aug 3, 2013
6
0
norwich
Oh and Amandajane, I'm sorry for what you are going through .. Appearently I was supposed to post my previous comment as a question or something and not as an answer to yours,( I'm sorry I'm new in this forum and didn't pay attention to that ) anyway, I just want you to know that I know what you're talking about, and I know what you must be feeling, but one thing I know, is that your father really needs you right now, and you should probably talk with your daughters and grandsons about your father's disease, the whole family is supposed to be aware of what is happeping with him, so they'd avoid irritationg him, or hurting his feelings. May God help you with that :)

Thank u for your message my daughters are helping as much as they can but they have young children them selfs , I just feel like I can not plan anything and I am a person who is a little OCD lol .been waking up about 4am worrying I guess it will get easier as it all sinks in abut more .
 

Nouha

Registered User
Aug 7, 2013
3
0
Thank u for your message my daughters are helping as much as they can but they have young children them selfs , I just feel like I can not plan anything and I am a person who is a little OCD lol .been waking up about 4am worrying I guess it will get easier as it all sinks in abut more .

Amandajane, ... There will always be good days and bad days in this, at least believing this makes us a little hopeful :p ... anyway, just know that you can't control everything that is happening ... I hope your good days will be much much more than your bad ones :)