Feeling Down

Status
Not open for further replies.

Bracks48

Registered User
Jun 18, 2016
47
0
I have checked and it is all as I said. Don’t know if you are in Scotland (which I am) and the rules maybe different?
 

Duggies-girl

Registered User
Sep 6, 2017
3,620
0
Hi @Bracks48 It doesn't matter what your brothers think, your mum has made her will and it will stand, her choice so your brothers need to accept that. I had sibling problems, didn't want to know, ignored everything and was too busy to help but also was very concerned about protecting their inheritance. I did everything for dad and lost out financially as unable to work and I won't get work now as I am almost 65 so 5 years without money plus all the emotional stress of caring. I am obviously financially okay now because I got half of dads estate but if dad had not had money I may have found myself in a bit of a fix after he died.

When dad died I sorted out everything as executor including dads property and probate etc then handed half of the inheritance over to my brother as per the will. He bought dads house with his half of his inheritance and moved in very pleased with himself as it was ideal. This was the brother who could never spend more than ten minutes in there when visiting dad. In hindsight he must have had his eye on the place for years. I have showed my face there a couple of times to hand things to him but there has been no contact since from him so I won't go again.

Don't worry about your brothers because they won't worry about you and they probably won't talk to you afterwards anyway.
 

silkiest

Registered User
Feb 9, 2017
865
0
Hi @Bracks48, you sound tired and fed up. I find the mental stress of constantly thinking of my relatives needs is very difficult. You don't need the hassle from your brothers - block them from your phone if they cannot be constructive.
If your LPA's are not registered please do it straight away. I cope by having regular carers for my parents and MIL. It is an extra pair of eyes and then I can worry less about the routine things such as medication and hygiene. Please don't feel guilty about getting in help, make some time for yourself and your grandchildren.
My MIL complained a lot and was rude to the carers, even pushing them out of her house at one stage, but the Admiral Nurse advised us to persist as it would become her "New Normal", which it did.
 

Cazcaz

Registered User
Apr 3, 2021
338
0
LPA finance and health
That’s excellent. It means you have sole control, without the need to worry about your brothers being able to interfere.

Make sure you register the LPAs (unfortunately that means your brothers must be told, but the sooner that is out of the way the better).

Then I would try to relax, the brothers may be difficult but they have no say, so can not do anything. You need to do what is best, trust yourself and your own judgement.

and if you need advice or just a rant, this is the best place for both.

Wishing you well.
 

Miss poodle

New member
Dec 24, 2021
4
0
Sorry to hear you are going through all this.

You say you have joint PoA with the eldest brother. Is that “joint” or “joint and severally”?

Either way things could get difficult there if he reacts badly to being “cut out” of the will or takes sides with ‘Bro 3’.
FEEL YOUR PAIN MY DAD PASSED AWAY & I am not allowed to see my mum as Elvira my sad sister moved in rent free and Grim reaper brother controls her after stroke, lost 2 parents at least I can pick my friends
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Staff online

Forum statistics

Threads
138,149
Messages
1,993,446
Members
89,810
Latest member
Anne2024