Well it's been a few months since I last posted, main reason is I've been so busy adjusting to this carer's role that descended on me a year ago and the fat lady hasn't sang yet as its not over by a long shot. Last night me and my husband watched a late night film, kids went to bed, so it was just me and him, which made a change, anyway I went to bed around 1.30am, and at 3.45am I was woken up by my husband telling me that lifeline called us as she's got a sensor on her door now and apparently Mum's front door opened at 3.40am and they called down the intercom to no response from my mother and they said it's likely she's not there! So up I got, got dressed , and as my husband hadn't been to bed yet, and had work in the morning I had to call a cab to take me down there which cost a bloody fortune being New Years week, for a 15 minute journey, anyway when I arrived it was about 4.10 am and I asked the cab driver to wait outside for me as I hate the dark and I hate being on my own in the dark, I went into the flat, and it was clear she wasn't there, so the voice came over the door intercom again and I told them that she'd gone and that I was going to go and look for her on the quay, the cab driver kindly offered to drive around and look, after I gave him a description of her, he drove off and I ended up at the thistle hotel because she was found there last time this happened, she wasn't, so I left and then decided to call the police, it was then as I was waiting to be put through I had a phone call waiting and it was the cab driver saying he'd found my mum! Like Jesus Christ you know!! So he brought her back to the flat and I met him, and she was in her nighty and pink dressing gown holding a teddy bear, a blanket, a pair of trousers, a blouse and a bra, and when she saw me the first thing she said to me was, oh What are you doing here!! So I thanked the cabbie, and took her back into the flat and told life line, it was 4.37am at this point, so I settled her down, and gave her something to eat and a drink and I put the telly on, she was wet, so I had to change her clothes, as she refused to keep her nighty on and go back to bed, so I was forced to stay there until her morning carer arrived which wasn't till 9 am, mum's mental state was all over the place, she was talking complete rubbish and as I hadn't had a lot of sleep, I was flagging, but I couldn't go home yet as she was very confused and all over the place so I couldn't leave her there on her own, anyway it got to 8.30am and I was so tired I had to go home, plus the kids would be up soon, so I left. The thing is this is one drama amongst many this year, and I'm feeling at the end of my tether, she's moving in with us in a few weeks time, and really I could of done without last night episode, but she only has me, and I can't give up on her, but Ive been so very tired today I can tell you and I'm dreading what tonight may bring.