My dad is the main carer for my mum who has lewy body dementia. They both live in sheltered housing and i live about 10mins away so i see them both at least once a week usually more. I like to give my dad a break so will often sit with mum so he can go out or i will just go over for tea and a chat. I want to see my mum as much as possible especially as she is declining quite quickly. I have two older sisters who live away. The middle sister gets to Ipswich as much as she can and she will also ring my dad regularly. My oldest sister is the problem cause i dont think she does enough. she very rarely rings my dad or comes to Ipswich to see my mum and dad. When she does come down she never talks to my dad about how my mum is and always seems to be in a hurry to get home. I have heard that she is finding it hard and that we all deal with something like this differently but we are all finding it hard particularly my dad. Its not easy seeing my mum going downhill so fast before my eyes and i have had plenty of tears about it but i feel like the important thing is to be there for them both especially my dad. Do i speak to my sister about doing more or leave her to it and concentrate on what im doing for my parents?
Feel my sister could do more!
- Thread starter sharpy
- Start date
Leave her to it, I'd say. You can't force someone to care, and maybe this is her coping mechanism for something she finds very hard to deal with. We all have "invisibles" somewhere in our family, and trying to get them to do more just saps the energy we need for other things. You might just have to accept that she is not as strong as you, or pure selfish - I wouldn't like to speculate.
Maybe chat to her to see how she feels about the situation. Some people simply struggle and to have someone to share with is sometimes what is needed. I wouldn't lay the law down or anything like that, just be open and kind.
It is hard to deal with all the fall out. Remember there is always people here to ask question or even rant to safely xx
It is hard to deal with all the fall out. Remember there is always people here to ask question or even rant to safely xx
hi im bill. Lost my wife in march this year .with l/b/d. My be you sister can not copy.sorry im dislex so bare with me . We are all diffrunt.all i can say with l/b/d time is not on you side .my wife lived for 5 years .and declin,very quck.so before you mam get to bad and you (will) not be able to talk to her or do anything with again . Have a chat with you sister to see if she is stgling with this .and help her has well .so she can be in volve belive me this will happen very quick this illness.good luck
