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fed up of assessments

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by jay jay, Jan 11, 2015.

  1. jay jay

    jay jay Registered User

    Mar 24, 2011
    13
    london
    Hi everyone.
    my mum has dementia and i am her full time carer, she has lived with me for the past two years. I am fed up of being assessed and receiving no help. I did ask for a day center for her and we were given a two hour session in one that is local, as soon as we walked in she wanted to get out, but i convinced her to stay and i had to stay with her, the second time she was not happy to go, and a situation occured where i had to leave her for almost an hour. On my return my mum was sitting in the same chair on her own, and not one of the staff was urging her to take part in anything. Needless to say my mum will not go back now and has not helped trying to get her in another.
    I have people coming into our home telling us we can have this and she can have that, but it never materialises. I am just so fed up and angry, I am now waiting to hear if my mum can go to a place for respite, {but wait} we have to be assessed again. I feel like everything is a waste of time.
     
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,853
    Female
    Scotland
    I know exactly how you feel. I have an A4 sheet filled top to bottom with names and phone numbers of all the people involved with my husband over the last two years. All lovely, all promising to provide help - none as yet. Often on the brink of help but someone goes off sick or on holiday or some emergency crops up!

    I have yet another appointment this week to discuss day care so we will see what happens. The irony is that my husband is quite keen to go to a day centre as I have him primed that he needs more stimulation than I can provide. I do take him to lots of Alz groups so he is used to mixing with other people although cannot remember a single name of any of the people we meet.

    Good luck.
     
  3. jay jay

    jay jay Registered User

    Mar 24, 2011
    13
    london
    Hi Marionq, yes that's how it goes, the worker who is visiting us was supposed to visit last week, but is ill so had to reschedule, as of yet have not heard from him, even though he thought i needed to see a councilor as i have my daughter suffering from ed, and it gets really hard. Mum does not like the idea of going to a day center after her last experience, but i think it would be good for her, as you say they can offer more stimulation than i can. good luck with all you do. xx
     

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