1. Lhamo

    Lhamo Registered User

    Aug 25, 2006
    1
    France
    Dear Friends
    My father in law is living with AD (diagnosed 2 years ago) and has been steadily declining over the past few months. He is very difficult to get out of bed in the morning, spends his day in his arm chair, is only occaisonally interested in the television but changes channels every few seconds, doesn't read and mostly dozes. He sits there until lunch and then returns to his chair for the afternoon. He sneaks back to bed if he can get away with it. He has trouble moving around and is exhausted by even a small physical effort. He would happily spend his day under the covers, no matter how hot it is here in the summer. He is in bed and asleep straight after the evening meal. He constantly complains of being tired and sighs a lot. He has 2 phrases he repeats ad infinitum "I'm old" and "I'm tired". Otherwise he doesn't intiate any conversation. My husband and I feel that he does genuinely seem fatigued (rather than just saying so) and we are wondering if this is a common symptom of the disease. It seems to be getting worse and worse. My mother in law is in poor health and is very srtessed by her husband's behaviour. She is trying her best but lacks patience and understanding and feels he is just whining and being lazy. We are fidning it very difficult to make her understand he is ill. Should we be forcing him to do things or let him be as he seems to prefer. This stage seems to correspond to stage 5 or 6 in the scale mentioned on this site. We don't want to stress or upset him but we are a bit lost as to how to deal with this change in his behaviour. And we are equally challenged by my mother in law's hostility and lack of compassion towards her husband. We live on their property (independently) and want to play a very active role in trying to keep him at home for as long as possible. Bit of a rant I know......... Just needed to let off some steam. Maybe someone has some insight or common experience to share. Kind regards
     
  2. Lonestray

    Lonestray Registered User

    Aug 3, 2006
    236
    Hereford
    Sleeping

    I have been caring for my wife alone coming up for near 3 yrs and 5 mts. She sleeps most of the time and is incapbale of any movement and lost her speech almost 4 yrs ago. This morning after washing, feeding and dressing her I sat her in her chair where she fell asleep while I got ready. I woke her, straped her in the w/chair for transfer to car. Twice a week I take her out shopping at the supermarket around town. Shortly I'll take her for a walk. I know if I didn't move her she would lose out on seeing other activities and fresh air. No point in getting upset with loved ones, it's a waste. Alzheimer's and they come as a package show them you love them all the more for it. After 11 years of my wife's AD I have discovered contentment and happiness. To me there is only the past from which I learn and there's NOW when I can only do my very best. No one can tell me how long NOW will last, so why worry about what might or might not happen. It may sound Irish like me but why not enjoy NOW while you have it? God bless. Padraig
     
  3. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Padraig

    your posts, without exception, have been inspirational, and for that I thank you.
     
  4. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,439
    You don't say how old your FIL is. Even the well elderly tend to sleep more, even if it's more like dozing than sleep. Personally, I can well understand the desire of someone for whom life is confusing to retreat to their bed and sleep - I have no idea what the dreams of an Alzheimers patient are like, but they are probably no less confusing than life. Of course, simply having AD doesn't mean that you can't have other health issues. Anaemia, depression and vitamin deficiency are just 3 things that could make a well person exhausted. Perhaps a visit to the GP is in order?

    Jennifer
     
  5. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,578
    Kent
    My husband has had a very good run, recently and has been energetic and bright. He has slept well and woken between 7-8am, and hasn`t slept during the daytime at all.

    Now he seems to have taken a turn for the worse. He is more confused and depressed than he has been of late and he feels he is getting worse.

    Yesterday, he went to bed in the afternoon and slept till tea time, then he went to bed at 7pm and slept till midnight. He then went to bed ar 1am, after a drink, and slept till morning. During the time he was awake, he couldn`t stop yawning.

    What is it? Is it lack of oxygen to the blood and brain or a need to escape by sleeping.

    My husband was dianosed 2 years ago and the GP thinks his circulation has been affected by Diabetes. Are there any other TP members, further down the line who can shed any light?

    I understand that we yawn when we are not taking in enough oxygen and that we sleep to blot out unhappiness.

    Grannie G
     
  6. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi
    My Dad also yawns a lot and would sleep if Mum let him. (Mum also has AD/dementia) She is the opposite full of energy, has to be on the go continually or gets bored. When Dad goes for a nap, when Mum allows him, she will go to the bedroom every 5 mins and wakes him to ask if he is sleeping! I fell soo sorry for Dad, but with 2 of them what can I do?
    Alfjess
     
  7. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    I agree with Jennifer perhaps a visit to GP is in order. My husband is always exhausted but does resist going back to bed (I think the effort of the stairs is the offput here). I am not sure that fatigue is due to Alz. Are there other conditons that might contribute to this; even depression itself can cause a boredom that may account for the wish to go to bed. (My husband has heart problem, borderline diabetes, thyroid deficiencies, fibra myalgia - these all contribute to tiredness).

    I am sure the medics would do a blood test to eliminate other problems. Best wishes Beckyjan
     
  8. Helena

    Helena Registered User

    May 24, 2006
    715
    Becky

    as your husband has Thyroid deficiences it could be that he is being treated with either inadequate or incorrect thyroid medication

    The blood tests are notoriously inaccurate where thyroid is concerned and many many people are allergic to or unable to take Thyroxine but this situation is not widely recognised ........the end result is fibromyalgia, fatigue and dementia

    you might care to look at www.drlowe.com and join TPA-UK@yahoogroups.com for a lot more info
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,578
    Kent
    Hi Alfjess
    My heart goes out to you. Coping with one with AD is bad enough, but two, must try the patience of a saint, especially if they have opposite practices.

    When my husband is depressed, he just wants to sleep. When he has some respite from the depression, he too wants to be doing something all the time.

    I have to fit my life to his swings. I get so tired sometimes, I just want to `switch off` but he is now at the stage when he is unable to occupy himself and needs me to find ways to keep him going.

    Sorry Alfjess, I began by feeling sorry for you but ended up being sorry for myself.

    Grannie G
     
  10. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Granny G
    That's all right, I feel sorry for everyone who has to cope with this terrible illness and it is ok to feel sorry for yourself, sometimes. I think it must be especially difficult, if it is a partner who is suffering. After all it is difficult to lose the support and sense of someone whom you have relied on all of your married life.
    My parents have been a great support to me in the past and I think of things now, as pay back time, more so my Dad who was there for me whatever I needed, but if it was my husband I don't think I could cope, because he is the ever patient one and always very supportive
    Aljess
     
  11. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Hi Grannie G,
    I always think your posts are so positive and supportive of others - you are allowed to feel sorry for yourself sometimes.
    Here's a <<<Hug>>>, and hoping that you manage to find a little time for yourself this weekend.
    Take care.
    Love Helen
     
  12. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Helena: Thanks for the website re thyroid and fibramyalgia - very interesting stuff. My husband has had fibramy. for about 20 yrs - then, heart problems, then Alz., and now ? borderline diabetes or high blood sugar. Because of the order in which these problems arose, I cannot blame the treatment for underactive thyroid for his dementia - that was well on its way before we started thyroid tablets. The tiredness I think is due to all sorts of things; also bearing in mind he had a stroke two years ago. However I do think the complex medication does account for some tiredness - there has to be side effects. But where would he be without the medication!!?? I shall keep looking at the site and researching a little more. Thanks Beckyjan
     
  13. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    #13 Margarita, Aug 26, 2006
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2006
    Grannie G
    (4years on with AD) MY mother has Diabetes . Do you have a Blood glucose meter to check your husband blood sugar level? As if, it is to high blood sugar level they can sleep a lot.

    My district nurse came around last year and gave me the Blood glucose meter, as I called them in when mum was sleeping a lot. Also at that, time mum had high blood purser, was given more medication for the blood purser. last year I got mum a high back chair so she would not sleep so much, she still like to lie in bed then got mum in to daycentre to motivate her, now year on when mum does not go to daycentre mum still wants to sleep lost interest in TV even a Spanish channel on TV I found for her. It is sad really but I just accept it. if someone talks to mum she pick up wake up straight away always says she not sleeping .

    My mother sugar level is still high soon will need insulin

    I have Notice my mum Yawn a lot and about lack of oxygen . My mum Naps long wake looks at TV yawn Nap agina .
     
  14. Helena

    Helena Registered User

    May 24, 2006
    715
    Becky Jan

    If my husbands Hypothyroid had not been diagnosed when it was (and that was 6 years too late ) he too would have dementia

    He was well into Myxodeama Madness despite "normal" blood results

    He had central hypothyroid and that is not shown by any tests hence only by banging on desks and getting a referral to a Prof in London did we get a diagnosis

    However because they left him misdiagnosed and mistreated with chemical thyroxine that he is allergic to his muscles have been permantly damaged

    Had he been diagnosed correctly and treated with Armour Thyroid he would be totally well and fit
     
  15. Lila13

    Lila13 Registered User

    Feb 24, 2006
    1,342
    I thought I had early onset dementia and it turned out to be a thyroid disorder. (Of course I might have dementia too.)
     
  16. Lonestray

    Lonestray Registered User

    Aug 3, 2006
    236
    Hereford
    sleep

    Grannie G. I love to sleep and will take any chance I get to sleep. Often if I sit to watch the TV I can just drift off for as much as an hour. Ever since I was a child in my first Intitution I felt safe asleep in the Infirmary. In the second 'school' I just longed for the day's end of beatings and abuses to sleep. My wife sleeps about 16 hrs of the 24. I know she's back in time while sleeping, for when I awake her she always looks over my shoulder and as I lay her down she often becomes very emotional. I calm her down and tell her very gently "They've gone for now". I have learned to my cost to be careful for when I woke her for tea on the 6th April her eyes stared in fear, she started fighting for breath and stopped breathing. She was rushed to A&E and had to have her cloths cut off to start her heart. They failed to find the cause and appeared to accept my explanation. With 24/7 caring I sleep around 7 1/2hrs at night and if I'm over tired I find I fall asleep if I sit down. Natures way of protection. God bless. Padraig.
     

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