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Father in Spain needs help ASAP please help

4ndyp

New member
Jul 2, 2020
2
My father 75 years old has lived in Spain for 20 with his partner, they are both residents.
4 days ago he started being very dilisional. Thinking people are in the house and out to get him, wondering off.
She got him to the hospital, he was there 2 nights, had tests and scans.
His brain scan showed he has had 3 strokes, 1 we knew of 15 years ago.
All tests said he was ok, suposidly a psychiatric nurse see him and said he is ok, he had wondered off at the hospital and thought they were out to get him.
No one has mentioned alheimers or dementia.
Returned home, he wondered off in 34c heat and was found a few hours later slumped over.
At home he has been crawling on the floor trying to pick pattern off the carpet, accusing his partner or all sorts, thinks people are in the house.
She went to local doctor with notes and Spainish friend to help, the doctor checked notes and said he was ok from notes. he wasnt there as he wouldnt go.
He doesnt want to go to hospital or Doctors.
Today he seemed a bit better and held a conversation with me on the phone.
Tonight his partner called in tears as he is wondering around, saying the house is surrounded by soldiers and accusing her of all sorts or awful things. She hasnt been able to sleep in days

My sister is speaking to british consulate for help right now. (we both live in UK). They hae said they will contact her tomorrow morning.

Any help would be very helpful, thank you.
 

Amelie5a

Registered User
Nov 5, 2014
122
Scotland
You must feel so worried, particularly being so far away. And it's horrible to be told that someone you love is behaving in a strange and frightening way. I remember very clearly caring for my Dad when, one evening, he woke up from a deep sleep and was adamant the house was unsafe and people were out to get us. I was so relieved that it only happened over a couple of hours and I was able to break the pattern by taking him out in the car. Your dad's partner must be so worried - and scared.

I don't really have any answers for you - just a few thoughts.

- sudden delusional behaviour can be due to infection. You say your Dad had tests in hospital but could tests be repeated to rule out infection - particularly urinary?

- can your Dad's partner get back in touch with the psychiatric service (nurse) which evaluated your Dad - or approach a psychiatrist directly? If this is the first time this has happened, is completely out of character, and going on so long, she probably has to find a way to get the medical professionals to listen to her - to understand that this is not 'ok'

- does your Dad's partner have access to other expats/expat forum to ask for advice. There is often a lot of shared experience in those groups and by reaching out she may find someone who has had experience of Spanish psychiatric services.

Sorry not to have been of more help .
 

4ndyp

New member
Jul 2, 2020
2
You must feel so worried, particularly being so far away. And it's horrible to be told that someone you love is behaving in a strange and frightening way. I remember very clearly caring for my Dad when, one evening, he woke up from a deep sleep and was adamant the house was unsafe and people were out to get us. I was so relieved that it only happened over a couple of hours and I was able to break the pattern by taking him out in the car. Your dad's partner must be so worried - and scared.

I don't really have any answers for you - just a few thoughts.

- sudden delusional behaviour can be due to infection. You say your Dad had tests in hospital but could tests be repeated to rule out infection - particularly urinary?

- can your Dad's partner get back in touch with the psychiatric service (nurse) which evaluated your Dad - or approach a psychiatrist directly? If this is the first time this has happened, is completely out of character, and going on so long, she probably has to find a way to get the medical professionals to listen to her - to understand that this is not 'ok'

- does your Dad's partner have access to other expats/expat forum to ask for advice. There is often a lot of shared experience in those groups and by reaching out she may find someone who has had experience of Spanish psychiatric services.

Sorry not to have been of more help .
Thank you, it helps hearing other stories and opinions.

We all thought it was a UTI, hospital said it wasnt. It might not have been picked up.

The local doctor who they have never liked wasnt interested and said his notes are all ok. He wouldnt go to the doctors and doesnt want to go to a hospital. Would like to try and find a way to get him assesed, help for his behavior. If he has to go into care it would be better for him then wondering off in 34c sun. He is a big guy and his partner is scared worried and unable to care for him.

This has totally shocked her as this extreme behaviour only happened 5 days ago and was hoping it was just a UTI.

She rang up in tears tonight not knowing what to do. Trying to find a way of getting help for her. British consulate might be able to help tomorrow I hope.
 

Bunpoots

Volunteer Host
Apr 1, 2016
4,758
Nottinghamshire
Welcome to Dementia Talking Point @4ndyp

If your father has had two strokes in the past few days his behaviour may well improve. It must be so difficult for your mum and I hope she manages to get some help today.

In the meantime it can help if one deals with the situation as the PWD sees it so telling the soldiers to leave may help but I don’t know how your mum would deal with personal accusations. Perhaps this may give you both some ideas


It will also help if your mum can keep your dad well hydrated as dehydration causes increased confusion.
 

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