family .....whoed have um

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by Ann-marie, Jan 4, 2007.

  1. Ann-marie

    Ann-marie Registered User

    Dec 24, 2006
    26
    have had the biggest argument with my grans sister to night.....was visiting my gran at the home and we were chatting away ....when her sister and i dont know who but she hAD SOmeone with her anyway .....well she started as soon as she sat down ......my gran wouldnt talk to her and my gran wouldnt say anything to her .....and her sister said it was my fault cus i was spending to much time with her and she was forgetting all about them (guilty conscience i think) well then they brought my gran her tea and her sister tried to freed her like a baby well my gran was having none of it and the staff had to ask the other 2 to leave while my gran had her tea they went to the family room and expected me to follow ....then when my gran had finished her tea they took her to change her and cus i was in the toilet with her her sister started ......1st she said i shouldnt be visiting every day then she said she didnt think it was a good idea so i turned round and said i didnt care what she thought and to bo***ks.....then she asked why i was so clingy .at this point i proper lost it told her what i really thought of her and i never wanted to speak to her again .....so she went into the office to complain to a senior member of staff dont know what she said but theyve not said anything to me ......them she came back and talk to my gran for a bit and i heard her say that she was her only living relative ......what am i then just a figment of the imagination..lol...........dont know how this is going to affect how things turn out at the meeting tho
     
  2. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    Sorry to read what a hard time your haveing with your family , is it tomorrow the meeting?
     
  3. Ann-marie

    Ann-marie Registered User

    Dec 24, 2006
    26

    no its not tomorrow......its in a couple of weeks
     
  4. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,418
    Try not to worry Ann-Marie. If this stupid woman thinks that by you visitng less, your grandmother will remember other people more, I would suggest that she has her own intellectual problems. The staff in these places aren't blind - note they got the sister and her companion to leave not you.

    Unfortunately, assuming your grandmother hasn't any living children, her sister is her "nearest relative" from the point of view of the mental health act. On the other hand, if she normally resides with you, as I believe you said she did, you (and possibly your father, even though he's not a blood relative) would be considered to be her nearest relative. So, on balance, I really think that you should keep on doing what you're doing - visiting and making sure that she knows she's loved.

    Jennifer
     
  5. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,659
    Kent
    Isn`t it strange how jealousy and possessiveness come to the fore, when family members need to convince themselves, and others, they are of primary importance to ensure the well being of the sick.
    Ann-Marie, just let them get on with it. I`m sure it won`t affect the meeting. Your conscience is clear, you have been, and still are, a Very Important Person to your Gran and I`m sure all the care staff and Social Workers know it.
    Love Sylvia x
     
  6. Ann-marie

    Ann-marie Registered User

    Dec 24, 2006
    26

    no shes hasnt got any living children as mum died when i was young so gran sort of brought me up from the age of 11

    ive just been reading about nearest relative in he mental health act and it says

    Relatives who are "of the full blood" take precedence over half-relatives of the same category. Also, if the person concerned has been residing with a relative who has been caring for him/her, then that relative will take precedence.
    so from that it looks like im classed as nearest relative
     
  7. icare2

    icare2 Registered User

    Jun 18, 2006
    84
    scotland
    Family

    Hi,keep up the visiting and caring for your gran..bet she looks forward to it,and yes the hospital staff watch everything and all the visitors..best wishes
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.