Failed

[KatyKat]

I canceled the appointment with the estate planning attorney today. It doesn't matter that I was sick yesterday, didn't sleep last night so not fit to drive anywhere today, and this a.m., found Mum in the midst of a plumbing crisis. Her first words to me were "I called the police; I didn't know what to do". Neither does it matter that Mum was also sick with another intestinal upset.

No...none of it matters in the face of the fact that we needed this appointment, having serious matters to discuss which have been put off and put off...

I canceled, and I failed. I don't know whether this is only a setback or the beginning of the end. I've been operating on autopilot since Dad passed in January. My courage is failing, so perhaps the autopilot system is breaking down.

I'm thinking of changing my forum name to Useless or Failure.

 

[Thebeyond]

You must not be that harsh on yourself and accept the intended plans don't always follow our intended time frame due to external incidents, especially when they seem to come thick and fast when were under duress.
You've carried major weights , you not a failure, just a burdened person giving it what you can.

 

[canary]

Its not your fault that there was a crisis.
Im afraid thats dementia for you, constantly scuppering all our well laid plans.
Make another appointment and pick yourself up again. You are not a failure, just got delayed a bit.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))

 

[KatyKat]

You must not be that harsh on yourself and accept the intended plans don't always follow our intended time frame due to external incidents, especially when they seem to come thick and fast when were under duress.
You've carried major weights , you not a failure, just a burdened person giving it what you can.

I'm not usually hard on myself. The pain is worse today than usual.

While posting, I forgot to mention that although the police shut off the flooding sink valve before I arrived, no one had called a plumber: Mum can't seem to call anyone except me and my aunt and uncle lately. As soon as I made the plumber's appointment, Mum sniped "I know what you and those attorneys are up to. You're planning to do something to me".

That's when I said "I give up; screw this" and dialed the law office to cancel. The day went downhill from there, with Mum and me arguing, and then Mum in the bathroom most of the afternoon being sick. Two minutes ago, I got a call from one of Mum's neighbors, saying the garage door was open.? You'd think it was Friday the 13th.

 

[canary]

Im so sorry, you are tired and just not coping


BTW - how did your mum know you were going to see the attorney? Have you been trying to talk it over with your mum and explain things to her? She wont be able to understand and she will just start imagining things and getting wound up. Best not to say anything and make some excuse if she want to know where you are going.

 

[canary]

I won't let Mum know about it, until and unless the attorney insists he needs to speak with her personally

Its the best way - and even then dont tell her until the very last moment.

 

[KatyKat]

Its the best way - and even then dont tell her until the very last moment.

Agreed. I need to be very careful what I tell her from now on.