eye specialist , cataract , general anaesthetic or going blind ?

[Margarita]

I had to take mum to see a eye specialist consultant at are local PCT clinic as mum is diabetic, they organise transport and we pick mum up at day centre to take her to her appointment . While mum said “why don’t they leave me alone “I can see OK?

After mum screaming her head of, when they spray something in her eye, to do the test, turn out that mum got really bad cataract in one eye .

Which I knew, as last year in December 07 , mum was told she had it , but was not as bad as this year, last year mum stress about going did not like going , so I never went back . This appointment was made before telling me anything, transport arriving at my door, while mum was at day centre. So I went with transport man to pick mum up to take her to appointment.


So the specialist experience mum screaming in not wanting to cooperate, so now understand why I did not want to bring mum back in the first place . Only with me reassuring mum did mum cooperate doing the entire test. It was all for her own good, I keep telling mum while mum telling us all , "she can see people in the street & at home she sleep, so she OK , thank you very much , but she not coming anymore "


Specialist tell me that it’s not good getting mum to have a local anaesthetic, as she won’t cooperate , putting mum under completely is not good as mum has VD . Seeing mum say she OK, it could be that the good eye that not got the ccataract is working the bad eye to see .

All I could think of is how true that is ( local anaesthetic ) because I have read that on TP, that having general anaesthetic I think it’s call general when they knock you out completely can take the dementia worse .
But then I think what can be worse than being blind and having a dementia as mum doctor said a few years ago , that it mum does not go for her eye check up , she be blind with dementia is not a nice thing to happen .
When mum got home , she said will they put me to sleep , as transport man said I should get mum cataract removed , mum ask me what he said I told her .

Is it worth the risk , of making the Demetria worse?

Or just let mum go blind , if she does not get it removed .

 

[jenniferpa]

Maggie - how functional is her other eye? And how much does she use her eyes (does she watch TV etc?) Because I think if her other eye is OK then I'd be inclined not to do anything.

 

[Grannie G]

I agree with Jennifer, Maggie.

I am totally blind in one eye and had a cataract in the other. Because of possible complications I waited until I felt I had nothing to lose before I had the cataract surgery.

Even though I was considered blind and walked with a white stick I could still see. It was like looking through a net curtain. I still watched television and could even read subtitles if I was near enough.

I had an examination which caused me to be totally blind, in the dark, unable to see anything. This was the worst experience I had ever had . I lost my balance and was terrified.

I doubt this will happen to your mother, I`m sure she will just experience looking through a net curtain.

Please don`t take my word for it as everyone is different. Ask the optician if it is likely your mother will be totally blind or if she will feel she is looking through a net curtain.

 

[Margarita]

The other eye is as good as my eyes, as mum could read out the letters as far down as me, and I am short sighted. I was surprised & pleased to hear t mum could still remember call the letter out to read them out
Then with the other eye, mum could only read out the first line.

 

[Margarita]

Ask the optician if it is likely your mother will be totally blind or if she will feel she is looking through a net curtain.

I shall do .

I doubt this will happen to your mother, I`m sure she will just experience looking through a net curtain.

Now that is what I keep asking mum , she must be seeing cloudy, or misty . but no mum keep saying she can see.

 

[lesmisralbles]

What !!!

Even though I was considered blind and walked with a white stick I could still see. It was like looking through a net curtain. I still watched television and could even read subtitles if I was near enough.

I had an examination which caused me to be totally blind, in the dark, unable to see anything. This was the worst experience I had ever had . I lost my balance and was terrified.

Bloody Hell. My worse nightmare.
You continue to astound me.
Like my spellimf continues ti satoubd tiu

Barb XX

 

[Margarita]

As my mother progresses into the dementia, mum isolating me more , this evening my friend came around , lucky my 2 of my daughter where hear to experience it , as I am sure they never believed it when it happen before
Has anyone experience this? It’s not sundowing as mum never does it with my daughter who does not live with me , as mum told me she does it , because my friend my family .
Come 8 30 pm. Mum banging her Zimmer Frame up down, then telling us rudely when is my friend leaving, she should go now.
Part of me says, it’s because mum sleep in front room wants to sleep , but I know it’s not true, she just wants me all on my own with her , not talking to anyone . She does it to my daughters also if I had let her. I am talking to Social worker tomorrow try get her to understand that mum needs to go into a care home full time .

 

[Canadian Joanne]

My mother has cataracts

Hi Maggie,

My mother has cataracts in both eyes, one not so big. She went to the specialist about it in the fall of 2005. The specialist said she would have to be put under completely (general) as she wouldn't sit still for more than 10 seconds. He felt that surgery would only minimally improve her quality of life and he did not recommend it.

First, there is the aftercare involved. I just knew that my mother would pick at the bandage with her dirty hands which had probably just had a thorough scratch & rummage down her underpants. Not to mention that I would have had to drag her back & forth for the several check-ups - the next day, the next week etc.

Next, yes, I have heard grim stories of elderly people who have general anesthesia, and they don't necessarily have dementia. It takes longer for an older person to recover. Sometimes the person with AD goes down another notch, which they don't recover from.

If your mother is happy as she is, I would leave it alone. She can still see with one eye. I know it's your call but my opinion is to not have the surgery.

I am talking to Social worker tomorrow try get her to understand that mum needs to go into a care home full time .

The time is coming, Maggie. I hope that the SW realizes that you've taken care of your Mum as long as you can and now need to move to the next stage of your life.

Love,

 

[DeborahBlythe]

Part of me says, it’s because mum sleep in front room wants to sleep , but I know it’s not true, she just wants me all on my own with her , not talking to anyone . .

Hi Maggie, sorry to hear about your mum's demands. I expect she DOES want you around full time, and more. However, it could also be true that she 'wants her own space' and an early night. Many of my older friends, for example, can't be rung after 8.30pm because they are on their way to or already in bed. (I'm getting a bit like that myself )

Would it be possible for your mum to have a different bedroom? One that isn't also the main area for socialising? Could you get rehoused? Sorry if this sounds a bit much, but it sounds as if the layout of your home is making things worse for both you and your mum. Forgive me if this comes across as critical. It isn't meant to be, I just can't help admiring your mum. It's great that she still knows the difference between family and friends.

On the question of the cataracts, it's a close call. If you think you can help her all through the operation, AND supervise her closely afterwards to avoid infection, as Joanne describes, it might be worth it, but it would be hard work. My mum screamed the place down and shut her eyes tight when they even shone a beam into her eyes. She was beyond reasoning where eyedrops were concerned.The consultant didn't think it was feasible to carry out an operation, but my mum is quite a bit older than yours.Everyone is different. I believe that cataracts develop quite slowly, so your mum might maintain useful vision for many years to come without an operation.
Love Deborah xx

 

[Helen33]

Dear Maggie

Isn't it awful having such weighty responsibilities an d having to make dreadful choices about someone else's life

As you know Alan has just gone through all this and the first thing that comes to my mind is that Alan had to show that he understood the implications of the procedure and sign his agreement. I think we all knew he didn't understand fully but everyone cooperated with one another because it was clear that Alan was able to cooperate and follow the instructions under local anaesthetic. Had it been a general anaesthetic, even with FTD, it would have meant a serious re-think! It was understood that Alan needed to have treatment before he declined with regard to dementia.

The aftercare, even with Alan able to follow instruction, was and is a nightmare Alan would pull the patch off in his sleep and this meant that I hardly slept keeping a nightly vigil!
The aftercare with Alan was totally my responsibility because he was/is unable to be responsible for himself.

I would hate to be put in your position but I think if push came to shove then I think I would consider mum's more immediate welfare rather than her distant welfare Mum's immediate welfare is that she can see well enough for her needs.

I was sorry to read that things are reaching a stage where you are having to consider a care home full time. This, in itself, is going to be a dramatic and traumatic change for all of you. I don't think your mum should be expected to have to cope with this change and surgery anywhere remotely close together.

Sending you love and best wishes Maggie

 

[Margarita]

Would it be possible for your mum to have a different bedroom?

Oh how I wish she would, I have tried it & it has not work. I have even gone with my friend to my bedroom; mum gets so upset she ups the stairs wanting me to come down.
It’s just taking over my whole life completely and the worse is mum can’t help it. So unless I am prepared to give up my social life 100 percent, only have a social life when mum at respite care home. I then can look after my mother. I can’t do, just can’t do it. I know what I have to do and I shall have to do it, am always changing my mind it pathetic, I just can’t keep changing my mind.

Never thought it get to the stage , that I can not have friends in my own home , because it upsets mum to much .

Am going with my younger daughter somewhere that near social services office so shall pop in see if I can talk to Social worker, hopeful she can organise something for me,
My older daughter said I could put mum in respite , so she learn to no do that again , but then I said to my daughter . my mother not a child who you can punish to learn a lesson , she never learn from it, because in my mother perception she done nothing wrong .Then the worse part of it all , mum does tell me she sorry while it all happening ,Just like she did to every one at the clinic yesterday . so she may have some insight into what she doing . So confusing .

It reminds me of my younger daughter at the age of 2 or 3 , who hated me talking to my friends , because she wanted my attention 1001 percent , but then mum not a child like I said before .

New year respite has had a hard knock on effect on mum symptoms, like it has never done before .

 

[fredsnail]

9 months ago my Grandfather was living independantly with no assistance - other than me getting his shopping and taking his post and paying his bills.

Then he fell and broke his hip. Due to other medical issues they had to give him a general anesthetic - and since then he's developed every dementia symptom - and we had to battle for 4 months to get someone to take it seriously. He's now moved into a residential home.

He's been having treatment for his eye - while in hospital the physical appearance of his eye went strange - so they said that if it stayed in he'd develop meningitis so it had to be removed.

That meant another general anesthetic. He had that op 10 weeks ago, and his dementia has got much worse - every time we visit he is visibly worse - Christmas Day was the only time since the op that we had a near normal visit with only a few hallucinations. We are still battling to get him properly diagnosed and assessed - the home have been wonderful. The social worker we've not seen for dust since he found out Grandad would be self funding.

As long as Mum can see well enough for her needs with her good eye there is no need to make her symptoms worse with a general anesthetic IMO (but I'm not a medical person - maybe just wary after my experiences).

 

[Sandye]

Maggie, I'm sure my husband went markedly downhill after his heart surgery two years ago. He was still having hallucinations days after the surgery, and I was afraid he had suffered a stroke (because the symptoms were so bad). The doctor reassured me that he hadn't had a stroke...it just takes elderly people longer to recover from the anesthetic. However, he still seemed to go downhill faster after that.

My DH is also very demanding of my time and doesn't like to have visitors. He even hates it if I talk on the phone too long with one of my daughters. I would say your Mum's demands on your time and attention are fairly typical of the disease, IMHO, of course.

 

[Margarita]

As long as Mum can see well enough for her needs with her good eye there is no need to make her symptoms worse with a general anesthetic IMO (but I'm not a medical person - maybe just wary after my experiences).

Thank - you both.

I am not putting mum under all that stress. So the new 42in plasma TV I got has done the trick, in mum seeing the TV better.

Mum agitation rocketed sky high to day , with a test she had to do , all because I wanted mum in care home . So after seeing mum reaction for that test, they no way my mother could take the stress of going under completely. I am not ready to see it all progress faster , just to remove the cataract.

 

[Margaret W]

Dear Maggie

Just read all those replies. My mother-in-law had a cataract operation, it was a nightmare. She couldn't stand the drops after, there was no-one to put them in, and she was supposed to have the other one done. No way, she said.

She had no dementia at all, but the operation was bad enough. She was about 85 then. Ask what happens if you say no now, but change your mind in a few years. Will the operation be any worse? If not, I would be tempted to leave it for now.

Love

Margaret