I joined here last month after my father passed away. I haven't been on here for a while. I just wonder what life is all about now. I visit my dad's grave every day, I cant help it. I have hidden myself away since his death. I still have my mom and i am now terrified that i will lose her. I watch her constantly to see if she is ok. She is finding things so difficult so i don't want to burden her with my thoughts. The sun is shining and i don't care. Everyone says...think of the happy times....i cant...i want more happy times ....I want my dad back.