1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Hiya all,
    I was a bit fed up after Christmas, when dad phoned to say that they had decided to put mum to bed in an afternoon, rather than sitting in her chair, as they were concerned about her getting a sore. Felt like another nail in the coffin.

    So now she goes to bed about 2pm, and they get her up again at about 4.30pm.
    But what a difference - now when dad visits she has her eyes open mainly and is far more smiley and making more vocal sounds - last night it sounded as though she said 'oh yes' when dad asked if she would like a chocolate. Rather than eating her tea in a lounge, with dad perched on the arm of the chair, they sit together in her room (there are two armchairs), and listen to CD's (dad selects what he is going to take up each evening) or he puts the TV on - they've been watching Morse this week. It is so much better, because in the privacy of the room dad can be himself again - he sings to mum (Ow! Mum's poor ears) - he can show affection in a way that he could not downstairs. Dad wouldn't make a 'fuss' and ask them to take mum upstairs - thank God they became worried about her skin (the sore hasn't materialised), because dad seems much happier with how things are now.

    Just thought I'd share that.
    Love Helen
     
  2. rache3185

    rache3185 Registered User

    Aug 3, 2006
    12
    East Yorkshire
    good news

    Hi, that's such a nice thing to hear, I sure you all feel a little happier. I don't know your situation but i'm sure you are feeling better now with the circumstances and I'm sure your dads' singing can't be that bad ! Good to hear something positive

    Rach
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,719
    Kent
    Dear Helen, What a reassuring post. How good to hear the benefits of a very individual care plan. What a pleasure for your father too, to be able to visit under easier circumstances. Love Sylvia x
     
  4. daughter

    daughter Registered User

    Mar 16, 2005
    824
    Hi Helen,

    Isn't it strange how something changes, and we expect it's for the worse, and then it brings a surprising up-turn in circumstances! Great to hear about the benefits of the afternoon rest for your Mum and the bonus for your Dad.

    love Hazel.
     
  5. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    #5 BeckyJan, Jan 26, 2007
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2007
    How lovely that it has worked out well. I love the idea of your Dad singing to your Mum and he can obviously only feel free to do that in the privacy of their own room. I bet he sounds like Pavorotti to your Mum (spelling does not look right!).
    Great to hear positive threads at such a miserable time of the year.
    Best wishes Beckyjan
     
  6. alex

    alex Registered User

    Apr 10, 2006
    1,665
    It must be a great comfort to your mum, that she can still spend private time with your dad.............i would think it means a great deal to you too!

    Love Alex x
     
  7. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Helen, what a lovely post. It's so nice that your Mum and Dad can spend some time together in private, with your Mum so alert.

    It sounds like the perfect compromise, having time time togerther like at home, but with professional care for your Mum.

    I'm sure they both enjoy the singing.

    Love,
     
  8. Lucille

    Lucille Registered User

    Sep 10, 2005
    542
    Hi Helen

    What a lovely post. It sounds like both your mum and dad are gaining the benefit (well, depending on the standard of your dad's singing, I suppose). :D
     
  9. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Isn't it funny - I ve just reread what I wrote, and all your lovely comments - and I realise what a lovely picture I have painted. The thing is, if anyone else were to look into the room, they would see a very sick lady, totally unable to help herself, who occasionally smiles at those with her. We are so lucky, those of us that see through eyes of love.
    Love Helen
     
  10. mel

    mel Registered User

    Apr 30, 2006
    1,656
    Sheffield
    Hi Helen
    that really is a lovely post.....gives me much hope for the future
    Thank you:)
    Love Wendy xx
     
  11. Cate

    Cate Registered User

    Jul 2, 2006
    1,370
    Newport, Gwent
    Hi Helen

    Its obvious that your dad is enjoying the privates time with your mum, I expect that he can imagine for a little while that they are home together, and that must mean the world to both of them. You sound a lot happier too, which is fantastic.:)

    Love
    Cate
     
  12. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Amy, your dear mum and dad, in many ways, sound like Lionel and me.

    We sit in his roon, after we have had lunch with everyone else on the dementia wing, and then..................we let rip. Opera, Elvis. Cole Porter, Robbie Williams, Louis Armstrong, Rod Stewart..........whatever takes our fancy.

    I sit, with my feet up on his lap, and we let the music take over.
    There have to be some "plus's" in this life
     

    Attached Files:

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.