Registered User
Apr 16, 2006
Hi all I have not posted for a while I have been busy trying to clear mums house as I have now put it up for sale. I visit her every week and have to lie about the work I am doing on the house so she can go home soon. I am living with the dreaded guilt and can not see a day in the near future when I do not wake up feeling dread about what today brings. The home have told me to carry on with the white lie because she will eventually forget about home, but I think Mum will hang on to this till her dying day because she loved her home and even cut her holidays short to get back there. Because I have been feeling so bad I have been reading all of your messages but have not been able to post myself. Today I need help for a friend of mine whos MIL has gone down with memory problems to a severe degree over the past 4 weeks, she needs to get an EPA urgently and I have been unable to find the link you sent me in the past to download the forms can any one help!! thanks for your help and love to you all.


Registered User
Aug 20, 2006
Don't forget that in order to make a valid EPA you're friend's MIL must be "competent" ie she must understand what she is doing.


Registered User
Apr 29, 2007
Think we have left it too late for EPA

Mum & I have discussed EPA in the past - but when the subject was raised with Dad he became quite agitated at the very thought of anyone being resposible for his financial affairs - so I'm afraid to admit that we just left it..... Several years further on down the line now and due to his recent decline (following medical traumas) sadly I think we have left it too late for Dad to be classed as "competent" to sign any such documents.

Have "googled" this predicament - but can only find lots of warnings "not to leave it too late" (which I'm pretty sure we have done.) Does anyone know what we can do at this stage?

Any advice would be welcome...

Gill x

Margaret W

Registered User
Apr 28, 2007
North Derbyshire

As far as my understanding is, if your parent is able to understand what they are signing for, you can still make an EPA. As I find with my mum, some days she understands things and other days she doesn't. I would suggest to contact the medical staff at hospital or the GP or Social Worker and ask them to be there when you fill in the form. I have discovered they are all used to this and will be more than helpful.

Being diagnosed with AD doesn't mean you necessarily lose the ability to understand what you are signing for, so don't despair.

That said, I believe that most financial institutions (banks, building societies) will accept you as an Appointee on a bank account with a letter from the doctor - after all, they don't want the accounts to be used wrongly. The biggest hoop I have had to go through is with Gas and Electricity - they want a copy of EPA before they will even send me the bill! Well, do they want it paying or not, I ask?

Hope you get it sorted.




Registered User
Apr 29, 2007
Sue & Margaret

Thanks for your guidance with this & have printed off some relevant info to discuss with the CPN when I next meet her.

When Dad has a "good day" I think he would probably understand what we are asking him to sign - but then face the very real risk that he would be unwilling to agree to it.

On a bad day - he sadly wouldn't understand the concept and at such times it is difficult even to get him to do his signature on a blank piece of paper.....

Sort of stuck between a rock & a hard place - but I do appreciate the support & advice.

Many thanks

Gill x

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