I know from looking after my mother for 5 years, that in the first 2 year, I would not consider respite , but I had to be realistic and logical , I never had any other family to look after my mother , only I and my children . My son did look after my mother for a week, but it was to heavy mentality for him to realize what was really happening to my mother , but he did it bless him he was only 23 years old at the time . Looking after someone 24/7 is hard , if you have loads of brother sister that can take over share it all then your lucky .
I never, and I new I wanted to care for my mother in the long run , I am not self funded so could not afford to get a carer in during the night , even if my children would look after my mother during the day , and they to my family we all needed a rest for a week or two , my mother did not like it at the beginning nor did I , who would really , but I had to be realistic for my own mental heath , it was like a breath of fresh air going to respite and mum got use to it , because she always knows she coming back home to us .
Respite for me is better then getting to the stage of saying I can’t go on and putting my mother in care home full time
Even if you feel your not ready for it, phone you local area elderly social services in your area, just to find out how many weeks a year your local authority allows, I do not know if it’s a national Guide line for the 12 weeks a year, but in my area it runs from April, to April for the 12 weeks a year , and I only need to give one weeks notice , and they do have emergency respite also. For me just knowing its there is a life line if I find I am getting to stress in my role in looking after my mother is a great help for me and my family .
PS
Oh yes I to wonder if its worth all the Bother as my mother does get confused for the first week she gets back home to us, but this disease is only going to progress and get worse anyway, so why worry, why not look after yourself while caring, I find it simulate my mother more when she go and come home , keeping her alert. Then just being with me all the time, she meets other people and interact more