1. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    In another thread Margarita mentions entitlement to respite. Can anyone advise whether this is common in all areas and, if so, is that respite means tested or not?? I feel here that I am expected to know when I need it, find it, organise it etc etc - after all that I do wonder if any respite would be worthwhile. Its as if I could do with someone taking it out of my hands and just doing it for me!! - some hope.

    I do not think I am ready yet as the hassle would cause too much heartache for both of us. BUT I do realise that it will come at some stage and I would like to know about the funding entitlements, if there are any.

    Interested in all comments Best wishes to all Beckyjan
  2. allylee

    allylee Registered User

    Feb 28, 2005
    west mids
    Hi Beckyjan,
    My mums SW frequently offered respite care, although I didnt take up the offer, like you, I thought that it would just add to mums confusion.
    I believe it is means tested, a financial officer visited me to assess mums suitability to pay for respite and long term care, but we were also granted the higher rate attendance allowance to help cover the costs.

    Ally xx
  3. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    SW Scotland
    Hi Beckyjan

    Can't give you any specific info, as things are different here, but generally SS decide what you need, and arrange it. It's means tested, so unless you know you'll be self-funding, you'll have financial assessment form to fill in.

    SS here have beds under contract in one NH, and these are kept for respite.

    I'm sure you'll get more info from people with more experience -- I'll be interested in the replies.

  4. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    Hi BeckyJan,

    I feel I`m in the same position as you, interested in the pros and cons of respite provision but not ready to use it yet.

    So thanks for asking the question. I`ll be interested in the replies too.

    With love
  5. DickG

    DickG Registered User

    Feb 26, 2006
    Mary goes into respite for a week tomorrow. It began with the CPN getting in contact with the SW who carried out a carer's assessment and she decided I was a high priority and that I should have a weeks respite every 3 months. A financial assessment was then carried out (means testing) and since Mary had less than £25,000 she was entitled to free care.

    I understand that these rules apply throughout England.

    As to whether you are ready or not I would suggest that you are probably not the best person to judge; we are all invincible until we fall apart. I certainly was the last person to judge my ability to cope and it was only with the intervention of our Mental Health Team that saved my bacon.

  6. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    #6 Margarita, Mar 18, 2007
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2007
    I know from looking after my mother for 5 years, that in the first 2 year, I would not consider respite , but I had to be realistic and logical , I never had any other family to look after my mother , only I and my children . My son did look after my mother for a week, but it was to heavy mentality for him to realize what was really happening to my mother , but he did it bless him he was only 23 years old at the time . Looking after someone 24/7 is hard , if you have loads of brother sister that can take over share it all then your lucky .

    I never, and I new I wanted to care for my mother in the long run , I am not self funded so could not afford to get a carer in during the night , even if my children would look after my mother during the day , and they to my family we all needed a rest for a week or two , my mother did not like it at the beginning nor did I , who would really , but I had to be realistic for my own mental heath , it was like a breath of fresh air going to respite and mum got use to it , because she always knows she coming back home to us .

    Respite for me is better then getting to the stage of saying I can’t go on and putting my mother in care home full time

    Even if you feel your not ready for it, phone you local area elderly social services in your area, just to find out how many weeks a year your local authority allows, I do not know if it’s a national Guide line for the 12 weeks a year, but in my area it runs from April, to April for the 12 weeks a year , and I only need to give one weeks notice , and they do have emergency respite also. For me just knowing its there is a life line if I find I am getting to stress in my role in looking after my mother is a great help for me and my family .


    Oh yes I to wonder if its worth all the Bother as my mother does get confused for the first week she gets back home to us, but this disease is only going to progress and get worse anyway, so why worry, why not look after yourself while caring, I find it simulate my mother more when she go and come home , keeping her alert. Then just being with me all the time, she meets other people and interact more

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