This is how my Mum left... peacefully.
When my Mum died last February, she'd been in bed for about three or four weeks, gradually eating less, drinking only when prompted. She would wave her boney little arms and legs about...thank goodness for pyjamas...most of the time her modesty was protected!
The only time she was in pain, morphine was provided quickly by the GP. We had been through a couple of rehearsals with her, from which she recovered, but this time it was not to be. I sat with her, I talked to her, I read my book, I played Candy Crush...luckily I lived nearby so I was there 3/4/5 times a day, just a pop in, feed her a drop of tea from her sippy cup, ask the carers for cream for her heels and the tops of her insteps to stop them rubbing. I laughed with carers and life went on around her.
On her last night,when I left about 10 pm I said, as always,..." Night Night God Bless" then I went back and kissed her and said " Love you Mum, now let go".
Her breathing was shallow, she was Chayne- stoking...breathing shallow and with gaps between the breaths and then a bigger breath again.
She died at 06:00 on the 20th February.2015...I might have got there in time, I don't know...but it didn't matter, what did matter was that she died peacefully.
She was lucky...I sat with Dad when he fought for every breath he took...I know which end I'd prefer.
Just spend what time you can with your Dad.....and enjoy being with your family when you are apart.
Do Not feel any guilt if he dies without you being there.... It was not meant to
be. If you are together...that too will be as it was to be.
So if you've ploughed through this, congratulations
but take comfort...you have done your best.
Thinking of you....Maureen.