Hi all, this is my first post. My beautiful mum was 69 years old yesterday, she has had PCA Alzhiemer's for 8 years and been in a great dementia home for the last 2 years. My mum started to get worse after a nasty UTI earlier this year which resulted in incontinence. My mum has always tried to hide her illness and hated personal care as she found this embarrassing, even though I knew the home were treating her with the utmost dignity. A few weeks ago my mum spent 2-3 weeks in 2 different hospitals after falling, developing an infection in hospital. She refused to take meds or eat/drink unless I was there but then it was only a little amount. After a week of bloods being taken, scans etc. which were distressing her massively a decision was made to stop medical intervention and send her back to the home to die. The neurologist suspected silent seizures were the cause. Once back at the home she perked up slightly but fell when getting out of the chair. After a few days she just stopped eating and would only have the odd ice cream. My mum then became bed bound and deteriorated massively. Eventually she refused all fluid as she became unable to swallow. My mum is now day 9 with no food or drink and yesterday she started on morphine injections. I am struggling to deal with all of these emotions and understand what is happening to her. At times she is very coherent, although mostly sleeps. My mum seems to know what is happening to her in between medication and is embarrassed and distressed by it. She still refuses to drink and has palliative care for this. This morning she urinated twice and I am told she is very strong and her body is not really shutting down. I can't help but feel in denial wanting her to make a recovery. I know deep down this is not the case and she is dying. It is so cruel to watch and breaks my heart. My mum was my best friend and I miss her so much. I cared for her as she was on her own before coming in to the dementia home and have been on this very sad journey for the entire time. I just don't understand why at times she is coherent and her body is strong if she is dying, its like she's fighting it?
Sorry for such a traumatic post for my first one, I have just carried on dealing with it on my own really until now....thanks x
Sorry for such a traumatic post for my first one, I have just carried on dealing with it on my own really until now....thanks x