End coming soon?

Discussion in 'End of life care' started by Baby Bunty, Jan 8, 2019.

  1. Baby Bunty

    Baby Bunty Registered User

    Jan 24, 2018
    297
    Thank you all for your support...IWonder@ i am so sorry you going through this terrible ordeal..i think to witness a loved one be stripped off the dignity and also there self worth is horrific and inhuman to me..my mum like most parents and loved ones who go through this journey..was a very proud and dignity..she took amazing pride in her appearance and she raised 8 children..she never had much in monetary values..but our house was always full off love..alsways home cooked food on the go!!..my mum would be mortified to see herself like this..her children feeding her..cares and family seeing to personal needs.unable to move own body postion in bed..she been bed bound unable to move for nearly 10 months...she is in the foetal postion!!..just wish god would wrap his arm around her and let her have peace..i hate dementia with a passion they why it as took my beautiful mum..yet as left will a shell off a body..my heart and prayers goes out to everyone who is on the journey.xxx
     
  2. Baby Bunty

    Baby Bunty Registered User

    Jan 24, 2018
    297
    Hi all..had a call off sister today..mum not good..coughing and in pain..cares gave mum oromorph and mum nearly chocked!!.disrict nurse called said mum had aspritated..so strict nil by mouth..at 19.00 butter fly inserted and oxycodone given..i came and mum seemed a little settled..but by 23.00 mum was getting aggiatated..midazolam given..mum all settled...i feel so so frightened..it getting closer..and even thought all i want is for mum to be at peace..i still dont want to lose her and i know thats selfishness..feel totally distraught...home as assured me that they will phone if any change..advised to go home by district nurse..as it could be a long few days!!..
     
  3. Amy in the US

    Amy in the US Registered User

    Feb 28, 2015
    4,624
    USA
    Oh, it sounds heartbreaking, @Baby Bunty. I hope you are able to get some rest. Sending (((((((((hugs))))))))) your way.
     
  4. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,192
    Female
    Dundee
    Such a hard time for you @Baby Bunty.

    Wishing you strength and wishing peace for your mum.
     
  5. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    9,836
    Female
    South coast
    (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
     
  6. Baby Bunty

    Baby Bunty Registered User

    Jan 24, 2018
    297
    Thankyou all..your support means so much..When do they put sygrine driver in..i was given impression..that she needed 3 S/C injections first..this i dont feel happy about..as we had to wait yesterdat 3 hours for first nurse..second one only 20 mins..but feel anxious now as my fear is that mum is in pain and would wait.x
     
  7. Marcelle123

    Marcelle123 Registered User

    My heart goes out to you. I was there when my Mum passed in late 2017 - she'd been on a 'syringe driver' for a couple of days. What worry and grief you must be feeling. Thinking of you. xx
     
  8. Kikki21

    Kikki21 Registered User

    Feb 27, 2016
    1,953
    Female
    East Midlands
    Oh @Baby Bunty thid sounds awful for all concerned. I really hope they can get the pain sorted for your mum quickly & that she will be at peace soon. Big hugs xxx
     
  9. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    9,836
    Female
    South coast
    I think they try injections first - mum had (I think) 3 injections before she was put onto a syringe driver. She was in a care home rather than a nursing home, so the district nurses had to oversee the pain relief and give injections, so I had the same problem as you. Once mum was on the syringe driver she was much more comfortable and passed away 2 days later.

    I am hoping that, by now your mum will be on the syringe driver @Baby Bunty
     
  10. Baby Bunty

    Baby Bunty Registered User

    Jan 24, 2018
    297
    Sygrine driver now in place..but as also needed some sub cut injection..priest has given last rites...mums poor mouth is so so dry..got some artificial sylia..which i am put tiny amount on finger to put on her tongue...so so heartbroken..
     
  11. Baby Bunty

    Baby Bunty Registered User

    Jan 24, 2018
    297
    I honestly dont know what i am going to do..my mum is my whole..i totally idiolise her..i cant given begin to image my life without her..i love her so so much..finding it totally unbearable..i need my mum!!
     
  12. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,192
    Female
    Dundee
    The hardest of times @Baby Bunty. Wishing you strength for the days to come and wishing peace for your poor mum.
     
  13. AliceA

    AliceA Registered User

    May 27, 2016
    2,227
    Prayer and love to you, all your Mum has ever been will be in your heart. Xxx
     
  14. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    9,836
    Female
    South coast
    ((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))

    Play her favourite music. Tell her you love her, thank her for things she has done. Say your goodbyes.
    Put cream on her dry skin, use the little sponges/brushes to keep her mouth moist and put salve on her lips.

    You are into the last long vigil
    It wont be long now.
     
  15. Jezzer

    Jezzer Registered User

    Jun 12, 2016
    984
    Female
    Lincoln, UK
    I havent posted on TP since my darling Mum passed last September. I feel I have to respond @Baby Bunty because I was exactly where you are - wanting peace for my precious Mum but not wanting her to go. My best friend, confidante, my MUM! This is so, so hard but you will go on, believe me. I don't know if you any faith/beliefs but I have long believed we go on in another realm, free of the constraints of our earthly bodies. Sorry, I'm not trying to convert you, nor upset you but I've had lots of signs Mum is happy and free and one day I know we'll be reunited. I wish you strength and courage in the days and months ahead. Grief is unavoidable but lean on good friends - you WILL cope. I also pray for much needed release for your darling Mum. Take care xxxx
     
  16. BrianSausage

    BrianSausage Registered User

    Nov 2, 2018
    29
    My mum is nearing the end and she has syringe driver going in tomorrow.
    The hospice nurse has been out to assess her this afternoon. She’s not eaten for 3 days and just taking sips of water. Her urine output is really low, and she’s refusing her meds more regularly.
    She spends most of the time asleep and is agitated when awake.
    She’s on constant lorazepam at present and has injections of medazolam if she becomes too agitated. Hospice have said it’s kinder to put a syringe driver in now to stop the agitation and pain from injections.

    I’m sure she’s near the end now, but hope for all our sakes this doesn’t drag on.
     
  17. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    9,836
    Female
    South coast
    (((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))) @BrianSausage

    I hope your mum will be more at ease once the syringe driver is in place. Once they are on a syringe driver they are usually near the end. You will know when the very end is near as the breathing will change - there will be lots of gaps
     
  18. malengwa

    malengwa Registered User

    Jan 26, 2017
    257
    How are things today babybunty and Brian sausage?

    It's such a difficult, horrific time, like others I lost mum at the end of 2017. It's not so raw now but at the time, it was just desperately sad. I hope your mums are released soon, and as peacefully as possible. My thoughts with you.
    Keep posting if you feel able.
     
  19. BrianSausage

    BrianSausage Registered User

    Nov 2, 2018
    29
    I called the NH at lunchtime today and my mum had had a really bad night with agitation. The syringe driver went in at 12 today and the NH called this afternoon to say mum was very settled, and had had a little fluid. I’ll go and see her tomorrow and hopefully I’ll know more.
     
  20. KathrynAnne

    KathrynAnne Registered User

    Jun 6, 2018
    272
    Female
    South Yorkshire
    I hope your Mum remains settled and free of pain. Sending hugs xxx
     

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