Emergency assessment tomorrow

[LHS]

After 4 episodes of wandering or indeed running away from her live-in carer in the last few days involving many kind strangers, ambulance and police several times, my mum is having an emergency assessment tomorrow where I think Social Services will decide she finally has to go into a home. I knew this point would come but it still comes as a bit of an impact.

Not had tears yet but I am sure that will happen at the most inopportune moment. To be honest the last few days have been so hectic that I havent had time to cry. I just know that I personally will not have the mental strength to actually take her and leave her at a home, so I am hoping either the Council can do this or another relative. She has always been completely defiant about her condition and equally defiant about taking any medication and I know that she will be climbing the walls trying to get out and that they will in all likelihood have to sedate her at the start. I just hope she will be able to settle in to a new normal and wont hate me.

 

[Sarasa]

Hi @LHS, I hope the meeting goes as well as it can. Moving to a care home is a big step but it sounds that is what your mother needs. My mother tried escaping from her care home quite a few times in the early weeks, but they were brilliant at distracting her and helping her settle. Homes are very good at welcoming people in and are used to people who aren't keen to be there.
I hope you have family around who can help support you at this time, but there will be loads of people on Dementia Talking Point supporting your virtually. I'm sure someone who has moved a loved one into care during this covid crisis will be along shortly with their tips of what to do to make it as smooth as possible.

 

[imthedaughter]

Oh no, this is the most stressful of times. Once this kind of thing (the wandering! The escaping!) is happening the options are limited, and I hope your mum gets the assistance she needs (if not wants!) My dad had a short but enthusiastic career as an escapee from his care home, but you may find your mum is placed in a more secure establishment due to her previous record. I did personally move my dad, with some assistance from my brothers, and it was really hard - but obviously the right thing to do. I - and others on here - will be rooting for you!