Drs Visit and Potential Assessment

[Sighthoundmum]

Hello, just looking for some advice. Managed to get my gran in for a face-to-face appointment in two weeks time. It's a double appointment, and I'm working on the assumption that I'll be going in with her. She signed a form a few months back saying they could talk about her medical results, etc, with me. My mum and aunt also have a POA in place for her.
We have been keeping a diary ever since her TIA (when this possible dementia really started taking off), which I will take with me. However, I wondered if I should also make a list of bullet points regarding behaviour, falls and the like? Just thinking if anyone has been through this before, what would you advise. Was there questions you forgot to ask, specific behaviours you forgot to mention, anything like that.
I'm anticipating that she might go into host mode, and behave perfectly normally for the doctor. My hope is that since I have a diary of incidents and behaviours, it will be taken more seriously than if I just showed up and say "well, sometimes she does this"
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I may not reply immediately to anyone, I'm working odd shifts this weekend, but I will do my best. Thank you

 

[jaymor]

My thoughts would be to do all that you have mentioned and send it to the doctor so he/she can read it before seeing your Gran. You might find it difficult to talk openly with your Gran sitting there and even alienate her because of what you are saying.

Once the Doctor has all your information he can speak directly to your Gran. Example you have written she is falling quite a lot. He asked her if she has ever had a fall to see what her answer is. Hostess mode will see her telling him she is fine, walks 4 miles a day and rides her bike down to the shops. Her perception of her life is likely to be very different to what you see And what is happening.

Take your notes along with you in case something that is important and needs saying has not been missed by the Doctor.

 

[MartinWL]

Follow the advice by @jaymor it will help a lot. When writing to the GP don't waffle, stick to facts, be succinct. Bullet points would be great!

 

[Lynmax]

Could you send in a bullet point list of concerns and incidents before the appointment so the doctor can read it without your gran in front of him? I was advised to do that and to keep it to one side of A4 paper rather than pages and pages of detail. My mums doctor said it really helped.

 

[Jaded'n'faded]

Add a note to say your gran will be putting on a show at the appointment and doing her best to pretend everything is fine when it really isn't! You'd be surprised how many doctors are not aware of host mode and can be completely fooled by it, taking everything at face value.

If there's something your gran has been obsessing about that shows how confused she is, maybe say, 'Ask her about the dustbins' or whatever. Often they answer the set questions well but will trip themselves up when the doctor asks about the dustbin she thinks the nieghbour is swapping for theirs every night...

 

[Sighthoundmum]

Thnk you all for your advice. I've knocked out a piece of paper with just the bare bones, ie falls a lot, sleeps a lot of the time, accusing people of stealing random stuff (dead flowers!)
I've also put together a longer one, with specific dates and instances, just in case it's needed.
Yesterday I also met one of our regular customers, that used to work for a dementia related charity. She's going to put me in contact with some of her former colleagues, so that will be a fantastic help

 

[Grannie G]

Well done @Sighthoundmum You are going about it the best way.

 

[Sighthoundmum]

So my gran finally had her Drs visit last Friday. She kept forgetting all about it, until the last minute.
As I previously wrote, I had a list of bullet points, outlining our concerns, ie several falls, accusing us of stealing (carrier bags now), ignoring hygiene, eating food straight out of the freezer. I went in with her to see the Dr, and I think he ws quite surprised when I whipped them out, and offered to cite specific instances from the diary. I suppose he was expecting something vague, like 'ooh, she's been a bit forgetful lately'.
She did pretty poorly in the tests he gave her. She remembered what year it was, eventually, and got the time right, but we had been emphasizing to her what time to get ready for the appointment. Couldn't count the months backwards at all, and couldn't remember the address he gave her to remember.
He's referring her urgently to the memory clinic. He did say he didn't know how quickly that would be, because he doesn't know how busy they are, but at least the ball is rolling now.
We're still keeping the diary, and I'm updating my list as needed. She's still doing badly. On saturday we told her to change her socks, since she had poo on them. She did that, rolled them up, then tried cleaning her jumper with them.
We are trying to emphasise that we think she may be a danger to herself. She doesn't realise when things are dangerous. When she set her microwave on fire they practically had to pull her out of the flat because she thought everything was fine. She had a tiny cut on her hand, because she's on blood thinners she just kept bleeding. It was all in her bed because she wnt to bed without looking after it. Luckily she didn't cut somewhere that would have bled more.

 

[Jaded'n'faded]

Sounds like your gran is definitely at the dangerous stage. (Also know as the, 'I can't believe she did that!' stage...)

I think you're doing a great job but you will have to continue to be vigilant because... anything can happen! Don't hold your breath for the Memory Clinic appointment - it will be a good while...

 

[Sighthoundmum]

Sounds like your gran is definitely at the dangerous stage. (Also know as the, 'I can't believe she did that!' stage...)

I think you're doing a great job but you will have to continue to be vigilant because... anything can happen! Don't hold your breath for the Memory Clinic appointment - it will be a good while...

Oh, I know. I can't remember if I've posted it before, but she set her microwave on fire last month. She lives in sheltered accommodation, and I had a call off the monitoring company to say her smoke alarm was going off. They couldn't get a response from her, and were sending fire engines. I'd left her half an hour before making sandwiches. She'd found a Xmas pudding from somewhere, and put it on high for 90 mins. The other residents thought it was a fire drill, luckily one of them checked and managed to winkle her out of the flat. The entire complex was smoked out. 2 fire engines, and they called an ambulance to check her over. The first responder thought she was fine, but one of her neighbours ended up in A+E from stress and smoke inhalation.
We've removed her microwave, stove, and mini oven from the flat, and we're sorting her out hot food. She thinks it was funny, and just laughs when you mention it