We are reaching the point where I believe my mother may have to go into a home, but I also know that she will be totally against it, and thinking of DOLS I am not sure what the Powers That Be will regard as in her best interests. I have Power of Attorney and want my mother to be happy, but also have to think about her long-term best interests.
Mum is currently still in her own home, with 24 hour live-in care which she has to self-fund. She is paying around £1,000 per week for this. My first choice care home for her will charge around £1,200 pw. When we add in the running costs of Mum's own house we feel it comes to much the same as living in the care home.
The problem is that Mum has now started getting up in the middle of the night, thinking it is morning at 2.00 a.m. etc. Any day now we expect to be told that we will need to pay for a second, waking night carer, to look after her at night. At that point the cost of her care at her own house will be around £2,000 per week - much more expensive than a care home (and outrageous that she should have to pay all that herself when she is ill, but that is another issue). Whilst she has the money in the bank then she could afford it, but of course the money will run out twice as fast - and then what happens?
I know that eventually Mum will have to go into a care home. She is currently in mid-stage Alzheimers, has difficulty understanding anything people say to her and we have great difficulty making sense of things she says, although she talks to herself continuously. Only things that are of extreme emotional impact seem to get through - such as the suggestion of leaving her home. However, physically she is as fit as a fiddle and on no medication at all. (Even came off the dementia meds as she refused to take them and doctor said there was no point in continuing to try as it only caused distress to her and carers.)
I have chosen a care home which is excellent, and I believe that Mum would be well cared for there, and could be happy. She tried it for a month last year and was always very happily occupied when I arrived, but always ended up saying she wanted to go home. It is only 10 minutes from my home, so I could see her every day, whereas she is currently 100 miles away from me.
Obviously I have no idea how long Mum will live, but my hope is that if she was paying for the care home her money might last long enough for her to stay for the rest of her life. If she stayed at home and the money was spent twice as fast, there is a very good chance that she would run out of money. The LA would not fund her to remain at home, so she would then have to go into a CH of the LA's choosing, or if she was already in the home I have chosen, she would have to move as the LA would not fund it.
Sorry this is so long-winded, but my question is, would a Best Interests meeting consider that the crippling cost of keeping Mum in her own home be an acceptable reason for moving her to a care home, even if she says she wants to stay at home?
Mum is currently still in her own home, with 24 hour live-in care which she has to self-fund. She is paying around £1,000 per week for this. My first choice care home for her will charge around £1,200 pw. When we add in the running costs of Mum's own house we feel it comes to much the same as living in the care home.
The problem is that Mum has now started getting up in the middle of the night, thinking it is morning at 2.00 a.m. etc. Any day now we expect to be told that we will need to pay for a second, waking night carer, to look after her at night. At that point the cost of her care at her own house will be around £2,000 per week - much more expensive than a care home (and outrageous that she should have to pay all that herself when she is ill, but that is another issue). Whilst she has the money in the bank then she could afford it, but of course the money will run out twice as fast - and then what happens?
I know that eventually Mum will have to go into a care home. She is currently in mid-stage Alzheimers, has difficulty understanding anything people say to her and we have great difficulty making sense of things she says, although she talks to herself continuously. Only things that are of extreme emotional impact seem to get through - such as the suggestion of leaving her home. However, physically she is as fit as a fiddle and on no medication at all. (Even came off the dementia meds as she refused to take them and doctor said there was no point in continuing to try as it only caused distress to her and carers.)
I have chosen a care home which is excellent, and I believe that Mum would be well cared for there, and could be happy. She tried it for a month last year and was always very happily occupied when I arrived, but always ended up saying she wanted to go home. It is only 10 minutes from my home, so I could see her every day, whereas she is currently 100 miles away from me.
Obviously I have no idea how long Mum will live, but my hope is that if she was paying for the care home her money might last long enough for her to stay for the rest of her life. If she stayed at home and the money was spent twice as fast, there is a very good chance that she would run out of money. The LA would not fund her to remain at home, so she would then have to go into a CH of the LA's choosing, or if she was already in the home I have chosen, she would have to move as the LA would not fund it.
Sorry this is so long-winded, but my question is, would a Best Interests meeting consider that the crippling cost of keeping Mum in her own home be an acceptable reason for moving her to a care home, even if she says she wants to stay at home?