Haven't been on the Forum for a couple of months but been reading and learning from others but I am struggling not to keep challenging Mum on one thing ....nearly everything else I follow the acknowledge/empathise/distract route. About 3 months ago Mum started mistaking Dad (her husband of 54 years) for her own Dad (who dies 27 years ago). They do have some similarities visually to be fair but some very clear differences e.g, her husband has a false eye). Until about two weeks ago Mum trusted me when I reassured her it was Dad but now she tells me I am wrong, it is her Dad. Dad has had to move into the spare room 'because she will not share a bed with her Dad', keeps telling him it's time he went home ( to her childhood address), won't buy food he likes/wants 'because he doesn't contribute financially' (Dad pays everything) and is generally treating him like an unwelcome houseguest. I keep challenging Mum on this as she also has started ringing us (me and Sister) at all hours of day and night upset that Dad hasn't come home, has he been in a car accident etc. I guess I don't want Mum to lose her husband and Dad to lose his wife. Should we just be accepting it or are there any ideas to help her remember? Thought about making her a book with up to date photos of us all and even a list of those people who have passed away but the latter feels quite cruel.
In the meantime Dad 's health/mobility deteriorating and he is exhausted. apart from accepting a 'housekeeper' coming in 3 hours a week, (and that has been a major breakthrough), can't get them to consider any other options. Love them both to bits but just horrible watching them resenting each other, not speaking, not living.
In the meantime Dad 's health/mobility deteriorating and he is exhausted. apart from accepting a 'housekeeper' coming in 3 hours a week, (and that has been a major breakthrough), can't get them to consider any other options. Love them both to bits but just horrible watching them resenting each other, not speaking, not living.