Discharge .. can they force her out ... they have an ambulance on standby

[purl]

well my aunt is ready for discharge. The hospital have an ambulance on standby to go to a home that assessed her last week and said they could take her. We are self funding. However, after seeing the home again and her room we aren't happy for her to go there but the hospital says she "has to go and they want it to be today". Do we have any legs to stand on at all to say no we don't want her to go there? If she was forced to go there we definately wouldn't keep her there and think another move would not be in her best interests. Another home was going to assess tomorrow but at present they don't have a bed.

STRESS

update ... we have found another home with a bed that was further away but at least we liked it and they can assess and take tomorrow. Hopefully the hospital will not insist today

 

[Spiro]

From your post it sounds as though your aunt is medically fit for discharge.

Firstly, I would discuss your concerns with PALS (Patient Advice Liaison Service) at the hospital and then speak to the discharge coordinator.

It would be helpful if you have a list of reasons which explain why you think it's not in your aunt's best interests to go the home you don't like. I'd also ask the home you prefer to contact the ward and arrange to assess her asap.

 

[Karjo]

we are led to believe that the main benefit of being self funding means you have choice, so am wondering now how true is this?

 

[bemused1]

I think these days self funding isn't quite what it used to be. Everybody is so concerned not to be saddled with costs they don't want to meet

 

[Pickles53]

I suppose if your preferred home has no vacancies there's not much you can do until one becomes available. Could you consider the other home on a temporary basis? I know moving twice is not ideal, but a hospital environment isn't the best either if you don't need to be there for medical reasons.

 

[purl]

thank you for your responses.

A home we are OK with is going out in the morning and will take her in the afternoon if they accept her. We did have two going out tomorrow to start with and were just so shocked that because the very first home that went last week said they would take her that the hospital said she had to go to it. Yes, it seems that even if you pay they wont give you any leeway. We are only talking a short period of time from last thursday until tomorrow for all three assessments but that wasn't acceptable to them. Next time I would advise anyone to get assessments done very close together.

We want her out asap being in hospital is sucking the life out of her and have been clear we want her out asap. I am so glad as well it will be out of county. The SW has been positively hostile to us ever since we said we wanted a CHC assessment and whilst I know we don't need a SW involved as self funding we are so thankful she wont be in the background anymore. The SW for another aunt was great and I am a social worker and was just so shocked at how she acted. Saying she would "wipe the floor" with us and that we are only relatives (when told with had POA for Health and Welfare) and she would decide what would happen not us does nothing to foster a positive working relationship and her being clear that her boss always backs her up in whatever she says felt really intimidating.

Should I take it the original HA would be the ones dealing with the Funded Nursing Care component which was granted and I take it they sort that out with the home direct?

 

[Pete R]

Should I take it the original HA would be the ones dealing with the Funded Nursing Care component which was granted and I take it they sort that out with the home direct?

The home should sort that out themselves with the NHS.

I am glad you are nearer to sorting something out.

May I suggest that any future conversation, in person or by phone, with the SW that you record them (lots of useful & free apps).

For power hungry SW's I found them to be a great leveller.

 

[purl]

The home should sort that out themselves with the NHS.

I am glad you are nearer to sorting something out.

May I suggest that any future conversation, in person or by phone, with the SW that you record them (lots of useful & free apps).

For power hungry SW's I found them to be a great leveller.

Yes we are so glad things look like they will be sorted. The home manager has even booked in the hairdresser for the day after she arrives and chiropody the day after so we can start getting her back to herself.

I shall have a look for apps for taping ... I am not the most technically savvy person in the world but yes, I really wish I could have done that, not to catch her but just to stop her.

I shall sleep well tonight for the first time in months and the relief in mum is so apparent.

 

[Pete R]

I shall have a look for apps for taping ... I am not the most technically savvy person in the world but yes, I really wish I could have done that, not to catch her but just to stop her.

I do hope that sleep came to you it can be so difficult to achieve sometimes.

As for the apps I can happily talk you through it but my advise to anyone with regards to tech is find yourself (legally of course) someone under the age of 16 and above 8 and all the magic needed will be revealed.

I would still urge you and anyone else to do the same as just having the proof that what has been said is wrong, without even revealing it, can fill you with confidence to carry on the fight.