Please forgive rant or what ever this post is about to be....I don't know anymore. Within days I have gone from relief at last care home sorted, organised. Exhausted trying to get organised for mum's move even down to the clothing labels arriving today. Yesterday bed was bought, chased everywhere looking for a small double. Bedding, soft furnishings. Everything in her favourite colours. Home rang. We even dashed back there and agreed to a different room. At last I felt Mum would get the best care she could and the terrible worry and concern of her living alone with Alzheimer's would be lifted. At least we could TRY..... Today at her house assessment from home took place. I arranged for others to attend and did as was instructed. Took round lunch. Took mum flowers. Anything to stop her moaning. As soon as she found out lady was from assisted living place she was not happy. "Who sent you"? "How did you get here" "who are you"? I do everything for myself. She of course does not. Not a thing. She had no recollection at all of visiting the place a couple of weeks ago with me and having a lovely day. She blamed me for the visit. Called me a drama queen. She has even been using a stick and complaining she can't walk but as soon as assessor went to leave she leapt up,and forgot stick to get her to the door. "I shan't be leaving this house". "Won't you even give your family a rest"? Answer : "no". Came home exhausted. Hospital appointment for me... Six missed calls from mum. Daughter also numerous calls. " I am lonely. I have not seen a soul for days. " I a am so miserable". I email home to explain that we will need the help of my daughter to get her to stay there next week as she listens to her. Email home with correct version of her living or rather daily existence. Brother who has been good with her while I have been ill backs up my email. By the time I sit down tonight receive message to say brother does not think we can force her there even though I have written letters confirming she needs 24 hour care from her two specialists that diagnosed her. Don't blame brother. It's a big responsibility having lasting power of attorney. He clearly feels guilty and wants to get deposit back tomorrow and cancel everything. I now feel sick to stomach. She cannot go on as she is. Brother also writes to home admitting she cannot last alone more than three days. I can't cope anymore. Too ill myself and trying to recover. I believe NO ONE wants to go in home. Brother says what we are doing is illeagal and we need need THREE medical people to put in writing to get her there. He wants to withdraw everything. Get refund and let her relatives from abroad visit now. I know she will be happy and looked after one in said home. It is lovely. I feel leaving her to live alone is dangerous. So where to turn. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. Brother says he is cancelling everything with home. So she will lose lovely room with great views etc and carry on until she has an accident or worse. She has already fallen. I feel alone. Back to square one. Daughter is only one she listens to. I still think we should give it a go next week and tell her honestly we can't cope and she needs to try it. I feel all effort and everything has been for nothing. Don't know now what home will say. Will have to wait to see what tomorrow brings. Do NOT agree with just trying to ignore problem and let her get worse alone at home where she unsafe. Is what we are trying to do illegal How can I overcome this before next week. What more can I do. I don't want any arguments as my brother I believe is doing what he thinks is right. He has cold feet and after all feels guilty. I have passed that stage. I feel guilty if she burns down the house or falls or worse. I think we have a duty to get her the best care we can. She does not know herself what the problem is. She has no insight and has always been incredibly selfish. Just feel so sick and at a loss. It is 1 am. Wish there was a magic sleepless lawyer out there or some one who could just help. Surely we have to TRY? I warned you. This is a rant. Cannot even think about sleep. Is there anyone out there with opinions or help. Thank you......... Sigh.