Yes, we just have to learn to live with it. That's very hard indeed.
The only way I can cope is by trying not to dwell on all the things that have gone (and I'm not sure that intelligence would be at the top of my list of the losses). Instead we have to try and appreciate what still remains - if we can.
Very true. Yet so difficult at times.
I find more ‘acceptance’ of the cognitive losses now than in the earlier years. (Husband has had vascular dementia at least 13 years) Partly because although I read all I could about dementia I didn’t fully understand it and at times thought my husband was ‘not trying hard enough’ for want of a better description. Especially when in numerous respects he still did have clarity.
Now that there have been so many losses over time I do hold on to what remains and appreciate that. But it takes time, also trial and error to get there.
Mabbs, we were very much as you describe and although I also still nattered to my husband I had come to accept that he did not understand. He also still looked at the newspaper but was only looking at the pictures.
I use past tense as now my husband has no coherent speech which makes communication extremely difficult. He often talks away at some length but I can only guess by facial expression, tone of voice etc., what he is saying - and he will be unaware of how he sounds.
Tuffydawn, it is very hard, and frustrating, and much more. But we cannot alter the course of the disease and have to find ways of coping with it. I do hope in time your son will realise that he cannot help it, he is no longer the man he was. As mabbs said, learn to go with the flow. But yes, that is often not so easily done.
Thinking of you
Loo x