I've tried getting a care needs assessment organised for my mother, who has vascular dementia, but they keep telling me that she doesnt meet the criteria!!?*** I put the following into my last email to Care Direct Plus: She needs reminding to take her medication She needs support to attend medical appointments (even though her GP is just down the road, she gets lost and ends wandering round in a confused state) She needs help with her finances, such as paying her 6 monthly service charge (which she claims she's never needed to pay before) She has to have someone do her washing for her, and some housework She needs support attending religious meetings and keeping in touch with family She is unable to use the telephone to make any calls other than to family and friends She doesn't cook - but eats sandwiches, quiche and ice creams She is in a constant state of confusion, being distressed and anxious She has telephoned us 3 times in the last week, in a state of panic, asking if she lives in her flat, because she thinks she is just on holiday, or here temporarily. This is of great concern because she spends most of her waking hours walking off her agitation/anxiety. How long before she gets lost? We tried using a tracker but she kept removing it from her keyring! She needs help with all her post as she cannot understand written communication And the list goes on... She lives alone. My husband and I are almost her sole carers - I have severe CFS and depression. We are worried about her safety when we are on holiday in May, but she refused to consider respite when I suggested it. They seem to take the view that unless she needs help with washing and dressing etc she's not eligible for an assessment. What am I doing wrong?