My 88 year old mother has lived with me and my partner for nearly 4 years. She does not have a dementia diagnosis but it is clear to the medics since a recent 2w spell in hospital as a result of dehydration that she is somewhere on the dementia spectrum. She was discharged home lunchtime yesterday, we had lunch together at home, she watched tennis in the afternoon and we had a nice supper. Within a couple of hours she was almost totally unresponsive and having called 111 an ambulence arrrived; with the paramedics she was alternately uresponsive and aggressive - flailing around, screaming and scratching and was taken to A&E and admitted to their diagnostic unit at 4am blood tests, xray etc showing nothing. She kept telling nurses etc to go away (and stronger) and continued to scratch.
In hospital we are continually told how wonderful she is and what a lovely lady; until now she's been fine with us. But things have fallen apart since coming home mid afternoon today and she won't talk to us, tells us to go away and stop nagging her, is refusing to eat and drink - saying we're doing everything for our convenience. She is particularly harsh on my partner. The hospital has arranged care workers to come in the morning to help her dress and wash. I fear for what will happen
Has anyone else faced this and found ways round it. She is a strong willed woman, and I realise that this behaviour is related to her illness and recognise that she is often confused and trying to make sense of the world. but I don't see how we can cope with this person in the house who won't eat or drink, won't get up and won't talk to us or listen. I know it's early days but we are both trying to work (I had to give up my job to care for her but try to do some work) are suffering from dreadful guilt and feelings of inadequacy. Any thoughts/experience gratefully received
In hospital we are continually told how wonderful she is and what a lovely lady; until now she's been fine with us. But things have fallen apart since coming home mid afternoon today and she won't talk to us, tells us to go away and stop nagging her, is refusing to eat and drink - saying we're doing everything for our convenience. She is particularly harsh on my partner. The hospital has arranged care workers to come in the morning to help her dress and wash. I fear for what will happen
Has anyone else faced this and found ways round it. She is a strong willed woman, and I realise that this behaviour is related to her illness and recognise that she is often confused and trying to make sense of the world. but I don't see how we can cope with this person in the house who won't eat or drink, won't get up and won't talk to us or listen. I know it's early days but we are both trying to work (I had to give up my job to care for her but try to do some work) are suffering from dreadful guilt and feelings of inadequacy. Any thoughts/experience gratefully received
