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Devastating Acute Delirium and vascular dementia

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
My poor Mum has been suffering with Vascular Dementia for seven years now.
During lockdown she broke her hip, and had to have an operation.
She was discharged into a nursing home, but then was rushed back to hospital because she got acute delirium, and stopped eating, drinking, wouldn’t take her medication.
she also became very violent, physically and verbally (Mum is normally the sweetest, kindest person in the world and has never sworn in her life)!!
She bit me so hard yesterday that I had to have a nurse pull her off me.
ive never seen anything so devastating and distressing in my life... I feel like my heart is breaking 💔
The hospital have now said they can’t do anything for her and are sending her back to the nursing home... they don’t want her back as she so challenging and just shut her in her room.
I feel desperate with worry.
I’m so close to her and am used to seeing her everyday...
I’m now only allowed to see her once a week for 20 mins.
Feeling so sad 😢
 

Linsac

Registered User
Aug 14, 2020
21
Oh my goodness you poor thing, how utterly distressing for you. I'm sure someone more knowledgeable will be along soon but my thoughts immediately were that she is in the wrong type of care home if they cannot cope with her. Is it a designated EMI home? If so they should be used to this sort of challenging behaviour. It is not acceptable for her to be shut away .

The visiting or lack of it is just terrible, it breaks my heart too and my mum is only in for respite care. I can't imagine what it is like for you all and also for your loved ones who are wondering why you no longer visit so much. Change is needed desperately.
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,301
Yorkshire
hello @Heidishut1
a warm welcome to DTP

what a horribly sad situation for you and your mum ... no wonder you are heartbroken and worried

there should be a hospital Social Worker, ask to speak with them and for their help .... it sounds as though input from the community psychiatric team is needed, maybe to re-assess your mum's medication, as there may be meds to help her settle
you might also speak with the PALS at the hospital as they will know that particular hospital's procedures

and Admiral Nurses are there to support carers, they may be able to mediate for you
 

angelict

Registered User
Jan 16, 2020
35
That's awful there is nothing you can do it's up to the hospital to sort it out look on the hospital website for Pals most of them close at 3pm and it's three working days to get back to you. There is always s hospital social worker on duty so they should be liaising with you. Admiral Nurses are on 0800 888 6678 if you can't get to speak to them leave a message as they do get extremely busy. Take a step back for you and best wishes and hope it gets sorted out.
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
664
Hello @Heidishut1 . I'm so sorry that you are going through this. My mother was in the same state, like a wild animal really, after a hip replacement and hospital stay, and it is traumatic to witness. It is very difficult when the person refuses medication. The nursing home should call out an emergency psychiatric team or doctor if they are unable to cope and your poor mum doesn't calm down.

I know this is truly awful for you and incredibly distressing. If it's any comfort, it is highly unlikely that your mum will remember any of it. My mother still has patches of this behaviour (normally when she has a urine infection) and never remembers anything about it. On occasion, she is left in her room to calm down but a carer is normally with her to ensure she doesn't hurt herself. Often she ends up sleeping and is better when she wakes, when she can be persuaded to take medication. I would hope that the staff are regularly checking up on your mum. As @canary mentions, your mum may have been quarantined if she has recently been in hospital.
 

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
Hello @Heidishut1 . I'm so sorry that you are going through this. My mother was in the same state, like a wild animal really, after a hip replacement and hospital stay, and it is traumatic to witness. It is very difficult when the person refuses medication. The nursing home should call out an emergency psychiatric team or doctor if they are unable to cope and your poor mum doesn't calm down.

I know this is truly awful for you and incredibly distressing. If it's any comfort, it is highly unlikely that your mum will remember any of it. My mother still has patches of this behaviour (normally when she has a urine infection) and never remembers anything about it. On occasion, she is left in her room to calm down but a carer is normally with her to ensure she doesn't hurt herself. Often she ends up sleeping and is better when she wakes, when she can be persuaded to take medication. I would hope that the staff are regularly checking up on your mum. As @canary mentions, your mum may have been quarantined if she has recently been in hospital.
 

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
Hi,
Thankyou so much for your reply to my post...
Mum has now been discharged back to the nursing home and I’m absolutely at my wits end.
She’s even worse than she was before... she’s so distressed that she’s bashing herself in the face in sheer frustration. She’s gone back to not eating, drinking or taking her medication and spends all of her time in her room alone because she’s so noisy.
And even worse, I’m not allowed to see her.
I feel like I will never see my Mum again as she’s rapidly deteriorating.
I feel like my heart is breaking 😔
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
13,593
South coast
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Im hoping the psychiatric team are involved
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
664
Oh, @Heidishut1, I'm so sorry to hear this. As @canary says, I hope the psychiatric team are involved. Have the staff said anything about that?

Often, when my mum is like this due to infection, she has had gaps when she has worn herself out, which has given staff a chance to give some liquid medication and a drink. Sometimes a doctor or paramedic coming in can calm her down enough to persuade her to take medication.
 

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Im hoping the psychiatric team are involved
The lady from the Care home has contacted the mental health team, but nothing is ever done with any urgency.
The doctor is going to see her today and I’m just hoping and praying that something can be done 😔
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
664
I will be keeping fingers firmly crossed for you and your mum @Heidishut1 . The doctor might just be able to do the trick or at least help things along. My mother once screamed for 36 hours almost non stop in her care home and refused all food, drink and medication. She immediately stopped screaming when a doctor walked in to her room and agreed to take medication.
 

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
I will be keeping fingers firmly crossed for you and your mum @Heidishut1 . The doctor might just be able to do the trick or at least help things along. My mother once screamed for 36 hours almost non stop in her care home and refused all food, drink and medication. She immediately stopped screaming when a doctor walked in to her room and agreed to take medication.
I do hope the doctor will be able to do something...
Mum has been in this state since June 22nd, so nearly three months now 😔
 

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
Oh, @Heidishut1, I'm so sorry to hear this. As @canary says, I hope the psychiatric team are involved. Have the staff said anything about that?

Often, when my mum is like this due to infection, she has had gaps when she has worn herself out, which has given staff a chance to give some liquid medication and a drink. Sometimes a doctor or paramedic coming in can calm her down enough to persuade her to take medication.
Poor Mum has been put on and taken off so many different medications over the last three months. It wouldn’t surprise me if this has something to do with her delirium.
She was on 10ml of Citalipram for a year, but they decided to stop that and try lorazepam, then they stopped that and now she’s on two different antipsychotic drugs, and Morphine patches for hip pain!!
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
664
Was the doctor able to help at all? These things can be so agonizingly slow while they try the next thing.
 

Heidishut1

New member
Sep 11, 2020
7
Was the doctor able to help at all? These things can be so agonizingly slow while they try the next thing.
I don’t know as I can’t get hold of anyone at the nursing home.
I’ve emailed and been ringing all day and no response whatsoever !!
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
664
I'm sorry to hear that. It's unnerving when you can't get a response on top of being so worried. I hope you have encouraging news soon.